Kid Stuff

John said, "I'm such a dufus." Anya excitedly replied, "I want to do fisses too."

Ruth brought Adam's size five pajamas for John to put on 18 month sized Joseph. Rachel knew right away just from seeing  the material that those were Adam's pajamas. John disagreed until he unfolded them. He still put them on Joseph to tease Ruth.

I brought Joseph and Adam to the mountains for a short walk while Rachel and Anya were in their dance class. For about the first ten minutes, Joseph would point up and say, "Look Mom, tees." It was soooo cute. Adam was really excited to be in the mountains too. I can't wait to take him hiking this summer.

Rachel's Dreams

Rachel asked, "Are we having just candy for dinner? I dreamed that we had just candy for dinner."
I answered, "No. I am afraid that only happens in dreams."

A little while later, Rachel said to Kate, "I do not have to pick up the living room because I dreamed that I did not have to pick up the living room."
Kate said, "Sorry Rachel. Dreams don't come true."
To which Rachel replied, "ALL MY DREAMS COME TRUE."

Mom, Dad, Kate, and Ruth echoed, "Rachel, clean up the living room."

How I Do It: Organization in a Big Family Part IV

Me with the child that got me started on scheduling

Scheduling

A long time ago when Kate was just a year old, I learned something very valuable that has helped me in being a mother to so many. After Kate turned one, she had consistent trouble with temper tantrums. After some prayer and serious observations, I learned that Kate would play happily all day except when we would transition from one thing to the next. She particularly had trouble when we had to go some place. This observation brought me back to my college days when I worked with children with ADHD and autism. 

I worked for a while in a pre-school with several different teachers. One classroom of kids stood out from the others. Most of the the classrooms went through a series of tragedies every day, except for this one. So I talked to this one teacher about what she did differently. She mentioned two main ideas. 

                                       1. At the beginning of the school year, she immediately punished any wrong behaviors, no exceptions. She said that the first month was awful, but after that the kids knew where they stood with her and for the most part behaved. This was obvious.

                                        2. She made a schedule and stuck to it better than glue. This schedule even included bathroom breaks. She said that she noticed that kids with disabilities tended to have break downs when things changed. But if they knew what was going to happen next they were okay with the change. 

With Kate breaking down during transitions, I thought it was time to put #2 into affect. I wrote a daily schedule, and stuck to it. After about a month, Kate quit having temper tantrums, and she would let me do the house work and cook dinner with out too much trouble. Through out my parenting of different toddlers, sticking to a schedule has helped our home be more peaceful and has helped me keep the house cleaner with fewer temper tantrums. 

Since Joshua was born I have had trouble sticking with my schedule and my younger children have had more trouble with coloring on the walls, fighting, and making ridiculous messes. My older children have had more trouble with doing their homework and chores cheerfully. Once, I decided to home school next school year, I felt pushed to get back on my schedule and things are calming down once more. The little kids don't bother me too much while I do my chores because they expect that to be happening everyday and they know that I will be attending to them and playing with them shortly. Scheduling for toddlers means throwing spontaneity out. And certainly, as far as life goes, it is not possible to stick to the same schedule every day. But when we do and can, my kids are happier. They know what to expect and I get more time playing, reading and just being with my kids.

I want to say that while advice #1 from the great teacher works well in a classroom setting, I do not recommend it for home life. As far as punishing behaviors go, it is good and works best to be consistent, but I think the only real solution is being good, and calm and keeping up on your prayers and scripture study so that you can hear the promptings of the Holy Ghost. I believe in home life, we need mercy a lot more than we need it in a classroom. I know that I need mercy from my husband and children and that my children need it from me and my husband and each other. Only the Holy Ghost can tell you when it is appropriate to be stern and when it is appropriate to extend mercy.

If anyone cares, here is my current daily schedule. This changes with the times and seasons, but here is what we do now:

6:30am Joshua wakes up to eat.

6:50am Ruth and I wake up. I unload the dishwasher, and start the laundry, while Ruth gets ready for school.

7:15am I read from the New Era to Ruth while she eats breakfast.

7:30am Ruth leaves for the bus, I do more laundry or attend to the baby,

7:45am I wake up the rest of the family and get breakfast on the table.

8:00am I get breakfast for the rest of the kids and read to them from the Friend. 

8:20am I check email, while Kate and Johnny get ready for school.

8:30am Kate and Johnny leave for school, and I feed the baby and start my morning big chore.

10:00am I get the little kids and myself cleaned and dressed.

10:30am I feed the baby and then we bake a snack together.

11:00am We have home school pre-school, coloring and drawing time.

11:45am We read stories.

12:15pm We have lunch

12:38pm We take Adam to school.

1:00pm This is nap time: Joseph goes to bed. I watch a show with Anya and Rachel while I feed Joshua. Then I put Joshua to bed and exercise. Rachel and anya watch a 30-40 minute show. Anya usually goes to sleep. 

2:30pm Rachel plays and I read blogs. And feed the baby before 3:30.

3:30pm I pick everyone up from school. We have snack and Home work. I help with home work and play on the floor with the little kids. I also start patch time with Adam.

5:30-6:00 I feed the baby and try and start dinner and I start cleaning things up.

6:30 chores start.

7:00pm dinner

7:30pm finish chores and baths and of course feed the baby.

8:15pm We have family scripture time and bedtime routines.

8:45pm The little kids are finally in bed.

9:00pm We clean up a little and then read or play games with the older kids.

10:00pm older kids and the baby go to bed, and John and I have time alone together until about midnight. And of course I feed the baby one more time.

Did You Know

Did you know that in the California legislature, there is currently a bill, SB48 , that would require all California public schools to portray homosexual, bisexual, and transgendered behavior in a positive light.  The bill requires that “gay history” be integrated into all textbooks and instructional materials. This is the second time this bill has passed through the California legislature. Governor Schwarzenegger, vetoed it the first time. Most people think that the current Governor of California will sign it in as a law. California's laws have had a profound affect on others states. Many states follow in California's political foot steps. If you live in California, or if you know some one in California, please ask them to contact their governor and ask him to VETO SB 48. Here is a link that, if you live in California you can use, and if you know some one in California you can pass along to help them either call or email the California Governor. http://savecalifornia.com/4-14-11-california-senate-mandates-homosexual-role-models-for-schoolchildren.html

Decent Johnny PICTURES?????

I told John I needed some recent pictures of Johnny and this is what I got.

John is magic, I don't know how he did it. Even with the kitchen as back ground, these are great!

Ramblings of a Different Sort

Today I exercised. I spent 32 minutes (yes, I time to the very second when it comes to exercise) on my elliptical.  I did not want to exercise. I was feeling tired and worn out from the morning routine. We have been getting to bed late. I wanted to take a nap-- not exercise. But, I first exercised some will power, or self-control or what ever it is called that forces you to do something when you don't want to do it.  And guess what? After, I spent 32 minutes on th elliptical, I felt pretty good. I felt good physically, and I felt good mentally. I have never   enjoyed exercise. I hate running. I would probably like biking, but I don't have a bike plus attachments for 4 kids. So I use the elliptical now that I have that and the treadmill when I had that. These are very boring ways to exercise. I think they make me hate exercising even more. With my parental responsibilities/choices, there is not another good way for me to exercise. I am sure I would never make it to a gym regularly. If I do the early in the morning stuff, it ruins my days. I am too tired and unproductive if I get up much before 7am. If I do the late at night stuff, I lose my precious time with John. So, I am doing the lonely, at home, all by myself with no one to push me type of exercise, and it is hard. I do better with peer pressure. I work harder when 5 skinny, muscular ladies are there watching me push my "I had 8 babies body".  But, I am doing it. I do it during nap time, so the kids don't ask me for things the entire half hour. I used to be excited for nap time each day. Now, I dread it, because I know I am going to have to push myself to exercise when I hate it. But, I am doing it, and I feel good when I have finished and especially when my face is flushed red and I am dripping with sweat. Tomorrow, when nap time comes, I will not want to exercise. I am sure I will be able to think of at least 3 convincing reasons, why I should not exercise just then. I will have to remind myself  that I will feel better physically and most especially, I will feel a lot better about myself because I have done something hard.

I see this sort of thing with my kids all of the time. Adam does not want to read because it is hard for him right now. After, Adam reads, he feels pretty good about himself and he is one step closer to becoming an independent reader. Ruth and Johnny do not like practicing the piano. But once they have learned a song, it is fun for them and they feel proud and want to show their accomplishments off to other people. I think learning to do hard things is one of the most self fulfilling things people can do. So, I will get on my elliptical for another half hour tomorrow and hate it, and I will make Ruth, Johnny, and Adam practice the piano, and I will make Adam read and Rachel work on her alphabet, and Kate work on her art, and Joshua lay on his stomach. They will probably all hate it and think I am a mean mom. But I think I am making a happy family by making all of us do hard things that we hate doing.

Ramblings

I've just been thinking a lot. My baby, is already 3 months old. I have conscientiously tried to enjoy those new born days. I know they go by so fast. Joshua  is such a calm, swet, easy going baby. He is easy to enjoy; he makes life feel better most of the time. But those newborn days are gone. Joshua holds himself up. He is smilely, and social. He has rolled a few times from his stomach to his back. He is not my new born baby anymore.

In a short five years, Ruth will be graduating high school and getting ready to head off to college. That is sad to think about. But at the same time, I know that THAT is what we are doing. We are trying to raise our children to be happy independent adults. I had Ruthy so she can grow up, go to college, get married and have kids of her own. It is bittersweet. I know I will miss Ruth's little kid years. I am going to conscientiously try to enjoy and have fun with Ruth through these last five years as she grows into that girl that will be saying goodbye and heading off to college.