This Week at Our House #42

This week was an ordinary week. The weather was nice and the kids spent a lot of time outside. Fall and Spring are the best in North Carolina. We had school, but are planning on taking this next week off to repair the roof, and clean up the yard, car, and shed. It won't be the funnest of vacations, but the work needs to be done. The kids are already claiming which outdoor chores they want.

1. We've a heard a little more from jobs, but you never know. We do need something very soon. John was sick on and off this week, so I am not sure how much he got done on his game. I know he feels pressed to finish it and was frustrated with being sick. For a few days he was worried that he had a disease rather than a virus, but then Susan got sick, and he felt glad to know it was something that could be passed on.
2. I failed the 3 hour blood glucose test and now have an official diagnoses of gestational diabetes. I have been off sugar and dessert for a long time, but now I am being very careful about carbs. One thing I find interesting is that I will often eat an apple for a snack after dinner and it is so sweet and good and I love it so much more than I did when I got an occasional piece of candy or a dessert.
3. Ruth got transferred. She is now over near water not far from the English channel. She was excited to be able see salt water again and to get out of the city. 
4. Kate worked on the art for her first kid's book and I believe she has the second one written. The art takes the longest and a lot of work on the computer.
5. Because I had 2 long doctor's appointments this week, Johnny helped a lot with school. 
6. Adam has been exercising a lot, in part because he loves to eat and in part because he likes having muscles. 
7. I spend a lot of time trying to convince Rachel to do certain important things that she really needs to do. Rachel has always had her own ways and own ideas and that is perfectly fine with me as long as the necessary things happen. And it turned out that this week we had different ideas on the matter. 
8. Anya was excited that her chicken followed her into the house, Her chicken knows her.  The same chicken also laid 7 eggs this week. The chickens have been greeting us at the door more asking for food. All summer long, they did not want much and now they seem more hungry. I think their bug supply is going away with the coming of cooler weather. Anya and Joseph love the chickens the most.
9. Joseph spent a lot of time sitting with Adam drawing pictures and then a lot of time outside playing and taking care of the animals. 
10. Joshua mostly played outside during his free time. He was also really good about school, and got all of his work done first every day this week.
11. Arwen has a little writing journal for school, and everyone of her stories are about ducks.
12.  Susan came to me and said, "Sam did this! He, he, he," then she looked frustrated because she did not have the words to describe it. And then, it was hilarious. She said, "Sam did this." She slowly dropped to the floor on her back and said, "and he cried and cried." That was a pretty cute explanation of a full on drop to the floor temper tantrum. The next night Rachel found Susan taking off her clothes and screaming desperately. She asked Susan what was wrong and Susan said that her whole body hurt. I knew the signs and we brought Susan in the bathtub where she writhed and screamed for about 15 minutes before puking. The poor girl cannot stand puking at all. Sitting in the tub was easier for us, because the last time she was sick, she would try to run away from her own puke. Fortunately, Susan seemed better almost immediately.
13. Sam is into everything!!!! He's always dumping out food because he wants it or wants to play with it. He dumped peanuts and yeast into the mortar and pestle. But when he dumps something it is always the whole package or box. We lost a large jar of peanuts to that. Another time this week, he dumped out a whole box of cereal. He also gets John's stuff so incessantly that John moved everything off of our closet floor and made it into a mini office with a lock on the door. But there is no plug in there, so Sam will still just go and unplug all of John's work computers.
14. I had another ultrasound this week-- the joys of having a high risk pregnancy-- and everything looks good. Even the extra amniotic fluid has gone down.

Pictures

From stick figures 3 months ago to this by Joseph

Kate's cover page for her first children's book

Stories from Ruth # 58

I am leaving for Gillingham tomorrow to serve with Sister Shin. It is sad to leave so many people who are going to be baptized in the next two weeks, but I am honestly so grateful for the opportunity I had to see so many miracles. Any success there was was because God blessed us and it was nothing that we did on our own. 

This Wednesday we had the wonderful opportunity of going to the temple with two recent converts Francesco and Richard. It was such a blessing to go and all of our hearts were deeply touched. After the trip Francesco just wanted to keep going back because he knew that it was a work from God and he wants to do the work to help his ancestors. It was really touching because both recent converts had lost their mothers and we were able to do that work for them. It was also Sister Thiruthtuvaraj's first time doing baptisms because they do not have a temple in India! I was so grateful for the opportunity I had to go and to feel of the spirit and importance of the temple.

I love this gospel I know that the church is true. This is God's church on the earth and because it is true it has the power to bring salvation unto man. No amount of belief alone can cause miracles, but faith which more than a belief in the only true and living God can. I love this quote by Burce R McConkie which says "But if he worships the true and living God, in spirit and in truth, then God Almighty will pour out his Spirit upon him, and he will have power to raise the dead, move mountains, entertain angels, and walk in celestial streets." I know this is true. I know God loves us and we can live with him again if we are righteous, keep his commandments, and truly come unto him.

Why I Privatized this Blog

I received this message: 

"I read your blog often to be able to see what you and your kids are up to but lately I have become more concerned as I read. I can no longer just watch and need to ask if you are in a controlling, abusive relationship. I see red flags with how you describe home life with John and how controlling he seems to be of what the children and you do. You talk about it often enough in your blog, I worry there is much more going on that you don’t talk about. Do you need help? Are you and your children safe, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally?"

It came from a person who I have only spoken to once in 2012. We were at a social gathering together when I tried to sit and talk to her because she was all alone sitting away from the group and not talking to anyone. 

I am very angry with the message, and I did not mince words. To accuse someone you don't know of abuse is a serious matter and I do not want anyone thinking such a thing is true.  John is not an abuser and it angers me to have him accused of it. This person made things up that I had not said, filling in blanks to fit her own narrative, and I am horrified. 

I usually try to be very nice about things, but I decided this was not the time to have compassion for a stranger's and feelings, but rather a time to put a stop to such untrue thoughts immediately. I don't want these horrible ideas to spread. So I gave the angriest reply I have ever given in my life.

She then came forward accusing me of writing things that I did not write. Fortunately, what I did write write still remains. 

Here are some the accusations:

John did not allow Kate to go to college: The truth is that Kate did not want to go to college. She wants to take a route less traveled and as an adult, that is her choice.

John is not letting Kate go on a mission: Nothing could be further from the truth. John was the first person to inspire Kate to go on a mission when she was still 16, and he will do even very drastic things such as selling a much loved home and property and moving to get her out in the mission field.

Everything John says in the home is what everyone has to do and we all just do it: The example given was in my last post when I said that John said no more offering computer time for chores. He thought the kids were spending too much time on the computer. I didn't disagree on that assessment, and I am not sure when limiting game time became abuse. 

And the truth: we are actually quite free about what we expect from each other and our children. John values my opinion more than I deserve. Together we counsel with our children on family matters and take their counsel and advice quite seriously. 

The truth is:

I want to put a stop to this sort of gossip now and forever. It breaks my heart. John is very good. Unemployment and health issues with a pregnancy and a van that needs repairs that we cannot make and difficulties with family and church leaders bother me little compared to having to hear accusations like this about my husband.

Yes, John has had employment trouble and it has been grueling. John has had to take a lot of slack from his family and my family, but he has not once reviled back. He just takes it, stays silent on the matter and keeps on working very hard on his own products and applying for jobs. His faith is more than solid. He is the reason my faith is solid, and my mental health is good. He is the reason our kids are happy and get along and barely even know we have troubles.

I cannot even remember the last time John and I had a fight. While this year has been the hardest year I have had in my life, it has been the best year of my marriage. Troubling times can tear people apart or they can bring people closer together. Troubling times can destroy faith or they can increase faith. We have chosen to increase our faith and grow in our love one toward another. There is no where else in this world where I receive more respect and love than in my own home. The kids very much feel the same way. 

And one more thing. John did not dictate what I should write on this matter. He told me to pray about it and decide how to handle it. He is currently asleep and does not even know what I am doing. Additionally, I do not believe in flattery or guile. I speak plainly. If there was a abuse, I would not hesitate to call it out.

This Week at Our House # 41

It was nice to have a much quieter week. Everything is still the same for the most part, but we had no further tragedies and that is nice. School went well. The kids are doing their work happily for the most part and continue to progress and learn. The weather was cooler too, and there mosquitoes are back to normal. 

1. John had part one of a job interview. I still need to grab screen shots of his current game which is coming along, though, I think he has a month to go. He is still working on making the "bad guy" ships, as well as programming the game play. We certainly need deliverance soon.
2. Well there is a first time for everything. I failed the one hour glucose test, and will be back again on Tuesday for the 3 hour test. But, it matters little to me. I was having problems in August and quit eating dessert and candy completely, which helped me to feel a little better. Now I am watching hidden sugars, which has been quite interesting. I was surprised to find out that an 8 oz cup of Greek yogurt had more sugar in it than an 8 oz cup of a homemade chocolate milkshake. But I am just staying away from both. 
3. I sure miss Ruth. I look forward to being able to talk to her. 
4. Kate is a very good artist and a very good writer, so we have been encouraging her to combine the two talents into kids books to sell kindle versions of on amazon. She got one written and illustrated onto paper this week. Then we scanned the drawings, which she will color and then design the pages.
5. Johnny was sick the first part of the week. Then at the end of the week, he snuck up early before I woke up and cleaned the two bathrooms for me. That was very nice because it gave me time to begin tackling a home repair that needed attention from hurricane damage. 
6. Adam has been happy to be outdoors more now that the weather has cooled down. He brings the kids outside to play a lot.
7. Rachel felt sick the beginning of the week. She kept Kate up in the middle of the night when she does not feel well. Fortunately, Kate never minds too much.
8. Anya has spent all of her free time outside this week. It really is nice to be outside and not sweat. Also, we got our first chicken egg and it was laid by Anya's chicken that she named Chickmunk.
9. Joseph continues to read a ton. This week he was either with a book or outside chasing the chickens.
10. Joshua cries too much. I liked how John explained it. He is the boy who just cries, so we never think there is anything wrong and we ignore it. For example, 5 minutes before dinner Josh asked if he could make a sandwich. I said no because dinner would be ready in 5 minutes. Josh immediately started bawling. Then in 5 minutes he happily ate a big healthy dinner.
11. Arwen will do anything for time to play a computer game. I have been using that, but now John says I can't anymore. That is sad for Arwen and I because now she won't get game time and now I can't get the floors picked up so pleasantly and easily.
12. Susan loves her toys. She likes to bring them to the table and set them up between boxes of cereal.
13. Sam had a little book he was looking at and singing with when I sat down to play the piano. Sam sat down beside me and began singing his little song, but to the tune I was playing on the piano.
14. I will have another ultrasound for this little guy coming up this week. I don't usually have this much prenatal care, and at this point, I am not sure it is that necessary. 

Pictures

I am not actually 59. But those were the candles we had.

Suzy wanted me to take a picture of the train track she built

Adam doing school work

chicken hat

Our first chicken egg,coming about a month after we thought

Stories from Ruth # 57

Okay... this is going to be a short email this week. I sent an email last week and it is still uploading so... hope this works!

We taught Theo all the commandments except and he is good! We also taught him the plan of salvation and he really enjoyed it! He has read up to 1 Nephi 20 and has also been reading D&C to prepare for institute.

The little boys are all doing good! They are so funny actually! Rafi and Erwin's mother is so sweet. Every time we go over to teach her boys she gives us a treat like chocolate from Ghana or caramel popcorn.

Saturday we met this guy named Ibrahim. He is a Muslim but he is looking for truth. We met him a couple of weeks ago and he said that he would call us and a week later he did. He told us that he wanted to meet and when we met him kept asking us to tell him what we know. We shared about the apostasy, restoration, and the Book of Mormon. Ibrahim told us afterwards that he felt like what we were sharing was true and that he had never had so many of his questions answered before.

I know that this church is true. I know that the message we share is true. God speaks to us. When

Adam fell, the Father withdrew and Jesus Christ was set as the mediator between us and our Heavenly Father. It is through His gospel that we can live with God again. Because the bible has been changed and many plain and precious truths have been lost we needed the Book of Mormon to restore that. We also needed a prophet who had the authority to establish and guide the church under the direction of Jesus Christ in these days. If there has always been revelation if Peter, James, and John, after they had taught with Christ still needed to learn and receive revelation once the Savior left them, so do we. We need revelation now in this day.

One of my favorite scriptures to share is 2 Nephi 29:7 "Know ye not that there are more nations than one? Know ye not that I, the Lord your God, have created all men, and that I remember those who are upon the isles of the sea; and that I rule in the heavens above and in the earth beneath; and I bring forth my word unto the children of men, yea, even upon all the nations of the earth?
8 "Wherefore murmur ye, because that ye shall receive more of my word? Know ye not that the testimony of two nations is a witness unto you that I am God, that I remember one nation like unto another? Wherefore, I speak the same words unto one nation like unto another. And when the two nations shall run together the testimony of the two nations shall run together also.
9 "And I do this that I may prove unto many that I am the same yesterday, today, and forever; and that I speak forth my words according to mine own pleasure. And because that I have spoken one word ye need not suppose that I cannot speak another; for my work is not yet finished; neither shall it be until the end of man, neither from that time henceforth and forever."
I know this is true. God's work is not finished and he still speaks to us if we are keeping his commandments and listening to his spirit.

This Week at Our House #40

I am not even sure how to begin to talk about this week. It was definitely a difficult week. On Monday, I found out that there may be a problem with the baby's brain. On Thursday, I was sent an hour and a half drive away to get a level II ultrasound to get some answers on the baby. About an hour into the drive, the engine light came on in the van, and the van began to vibrate. We did make it home and back, but it is clear that our van has some serious problems. Oh, and we found out on the way to this appointment that there was a tropical storm hitting us. That evening, we spent hours without electricity again. Apparently, it was from a hurricane that devestated a small part of the gulf coast of Florida.

1. John is just continuing to apply for jobs as well as work on his games. The current game is starting to look quite nice. I may steal a screen shot from John at some point to put on here, but we are in a desperate situation.
2. Between the baby and van and our desperate financial situation, I experienced a lot of anxiety this week. However, we did see some miracles from the Lord. Between Monday and Thursday when I had the two ultrasounds things seemed to have improved in the baby's brain, and we were informed by the specialist that there is nothing to be concerned about. Additionally, the fact the van made it that far and back home is a miracle. I have no idea how we are going to get it fixed or when. It is our only vehicle.
3. Ruth is experiencing the ups and downs of a mission. Many of her investigators who were planning on being baptized have changed their minds or just dropped off. I am sure she is continuing to work very hard.
4. Kate was sick for a couple of days this week and she surprised me by spending a lot of time playing a video game. In the past, Kate has had a religious conviction against such games. 
5. Johnny is still working on getting all of the Joseph Smith papers for our family. He also fixed a wall for me in my bedroom and did a very good job with that. 
6. Adam is doing quite well with school. He is the best of the kids in Spanish and he is starting to understand his math much more deeply and clearly than he has in the past. The weather cooled way down after the tropical storm, so Adam spent a lot more time outdoors. He also got the back fenced in area mowed much more quickly than he could in the hot weather.
7. Rachel has stepped up and is caring for the family much more than she ever has. She has been willingly washing dishes and doing laundry and trying to be cheerful.
8. Anya has also been doing laundry. I was surprised to come home from grocery shopping and have no more laundry to do. I had two more loads when I left. Anya asked if I could tell her when I do the laundry next, so she can help.
9. Joseph has been very happy to play outside a whole lot more. The mosquitoes have gone back to normal and the weather is cooler and it is nice outside once more.
10. I can get Josh and Arwen to do just about anything for an hour of computer time. I used this to get Josh to do his Friday chores well and with ease, but the older kids did not like me doing this because it took up time they were planning on using the computer.
11. As we were driving past a cotton field, Arwen said, "I love cotton. I think it is nicer than grass."
12. I bought dannon yogurt drinks for the kids, and Susan calls it monkey food because the bottle has a picture of a monkey on it. It's funny to hear her say, "I'm hungry. I want monkey food."
13. Sam calls Kate "A". However, we know that he can say Kate because he calls milkshakes, "Milk-Kates" and asked for "More Kate, more Kate," when he wanted more milkshake.
14. On Monday, we found out that our little boy had dilated ventricles in his brain. That basically means that he has more spinal fluid there than is normal. This was true for 3 parts of his brain. We were sent to the bigger city to get a more serious ultrasound and a diagnosis. We prayed for our son to heal in that time. We were not given the original measurements, but, when we had the detailed ultrasound, we found out that the extra fluid is miniscule. Normal is 10mm. Our son has 10.4mm. 11mm is considered low and not really risky and 15mm is considered severe and comes with risks. The doctor said that it is so small, that there is nothing to be concerned about. However, I have a lot of extra amniotic fluid. That is why I have felt so much bigger this pregnancy. The specialist said that is usually indicative of kidney problems or a blockage in the throat. But they checked for that and everything looks good. The other issue may be gestational diabetes. I have the test for that on Tuesday. The other risk of extra amniotic fluid is preterm labor from my water breaking early from the extra fluid. To me that seems unlikely. I have never had my water burst without assistance, and all of my other baby's had very thick water sacs. Still, we will continue to see the specialist as well as the other doctors. 

Pictures

Stories from Ruth #56

Ruth did not send out a general email this week. All I have is a few notes she sent on some scriptures, and this one little note on General Conference.

She wrote:
I knew that you would love it! I think it is a great change! And I like how bold they were this last general conference. Elder Oaks talk was pretty good and pretty bold. I also really like the whole shift from the mormon thing. They are going to be giving us new pass-a-long cards with the full name of the church and a picture of Jesus Christ! Yes!!!

This Week at Our House #39

We had a pretty normal week. The mosquitoes were still bad, better on some days and worse on others. School went well. The kids are doing what they need to be doing and staying on schedule without much fuss. John is still working very hard on his games. We loved General Conference, most particularly hearing from President Nelson. I love the new emphasis on religion in the home and small group and individual study. I have always had strong views on the necessity of teaching your children the gospel in the home. I know how good it has been for our kids and I am excited to see such teaching endorsed church-wide.

1. John had his birthday on Sunday. He is such a good man, husband and father. His game is coming along well. He often works through the night to move things along more quickly. I am glad that he is working so hard for us. I know that in time, we will see the fruits of his labor.
2. This pregnancy has been challenging for me. The kids have had to pick up my slack and lend more of a hand, but they are mostly doing it cheerfully.
3. Ruth is very busy with all of her investigators. I am sure that is a blessing on a mission, even if it is very tiring.
4. Kate made John a beautiful and delicious birthday cake. She does such a good job on everything she sets her hand to.
5. Johnny has still been busy downloading all of the Joseph Smith papers. After that, he will get back to his games.
6. Adam played cookies checkers between conference sessions on Saturday. That was the first time I ever heard him complaining of a stomach ache for eating too much junk food. Kate felt the same way.
7. Rachel has made up some of the funniest songs this week. This is definitely a talent she was born with.
8. Anya is doing really well with school. When I test her, she is getting things 100% right.
9. Joseph loves our chickens and ducks and takes very good care of them. He watches them and counts them and makes sure they are all safe throughout the day.
10. Joshua's reading continues to get better and better. He is much better at sounding out hard words and reading words he does not know through context clues. He no longer cries and says he cannot read when I ask him to read things.
11. Arwen was a very good little listener during general conference. I was surprised at how well she just sat and stayed in the room and listened to all 4 sessions.
12. Nearing the end of the last session of conference Susan asked me if we were done watching tv yet.
13. Sam is talking up a storm all day long, and he is loud and boisterous and cute and fun. 
14. I had the ultrasound and this baby is a boy. Also, I am measuring two weeks ahead of what I thought I was, so if the ultrasound and the tape measurement of my abdomen are correct, then I am due Jan 6th instead of Jan 20th, and am 27 weeks along instead of 25. I will just wait and see. 

Pictures

Kate's duck gives her hugs

Josh made this very impressive and detailed crocodile out of wooden blocks

profile

he has very chubby cheeks already