Just a couple days after I wrote the previous post about CPS and neighbors being out of control with allowing kids to play and become responsible, I ran into this. A father left his 6 and 9 year old at a park while he showered and ran some errands. A freaked out lady, without even talking to the kids, called the police. The father was sited with two counts of child endangerment, and CPS, of course, is investigating the family. This is just so ridiculous to me. Since when is it a crime for kids to play at a park without a parent? I let my kids go to the two parks near our house as much as they want to. They only rule I have about it is the kids 6 and under have to be accompanied by an older child. But, I would let the 6 year and 4 year old go with the seven year old. In my opinion, the noisy neighbor should be sited for busying the police without a cause.
I wanted to add some comments about this story from the Free Range Kids blog site. I think I am absolutely right in saying that parents are more afraid of CPS then having their children kidnapped or injured.
Michelle said: This is very disturbing to me! My kids (5, 7, 8, 10, 13, and 14) walk to
and play in our local park without me nearly every day. The only
restriction I’ve placed on them is that the 5yo has to have an older
sibling with her. I would have absolutely NO PROBLEM with my 5yo and 7yo
playing alone at the park all day long if they wanted to. They’ll come
home when they’re hungry!
Tairgire said: This is what makes me scared of letting my kids play alone in the park.
I’m not worried about “stranger danger” or any of that. I’m worried
about some busybody getting het up and calling CPS and losing my kids
for doing absolutely nothing wrong.
Amy O said: I completely agree with Taigire. I’m much more scared of the judgment
of my neighbors and the police about allowing my daughter freedoms than I
am of any imagined dangers she may face.
B said: It is a sad statement on our society that more of us (me included) are
afraid of CPS than we are of kidnappers. I WANT my kids to be able to
play by themselves. I want to be able to run into a store and leave my
two kids in a running, air-conditioned car. I want my kids to grow into
independent adults, not sniveling brats. We’ve given the power to
these red-tape mongers, “for the sake of the children!” Or at least
that’s what they trumpeted when they wrote the law. But we’ve provided
perverse incentives for CPS to do what is often the worst thing that
they could.
Victoria said: Echoing the comments that my biggest worry about my child playing alone
outside is not kidnappers, injury, or her becoming the victim of a crime
— it’s someone calling CPS and tearing my family apart.
3 comments:
I have to politely disagree with you on this one Diane, but I'm looking at it from a different perspective. According to the gospel we are to obey the laws of the land. Each state has a legal age where is it inappropriate to have a child babysitting.In most states the youngest age a child is legally allowed to babysit is at least 10 and I believe 12 might be more accurate. The 9 year old is, in essence, babysitting the younger sibling, by being dropped off at a park (leads me to think the home is not within walking distance if the dad went to a gym to shower instead of home, so the children were also stranded with no way home it seems?). It's breaking the laws of the land, by leaving the underage child as a babysitter of a younger sibling. If you don't like the laws you can work to change them, but ignoring them is breaking a commandment of the Lord.
I'm a bit more conservative on letting children 'roam' anyway, and I do agree that CPS oversteps the laws that govern them in many instances, but we have to be careful that we're not ignoring laws too. Just because 'everyone' lets their young children head to the park alone doesn't mean it's really legal. If there was a child legally old enough to babysit with them it's different! And again, if you don't like the law, work to have it changed, but obey the law that is in place until such change legally happens.
Well, those are my 2 cents, and I hope I didn't offend anyone, but I really wanted to offer a different perspective that most "free range" advocates ignore. I won't be coming back to read any more commments, so if somebody really disagrees with me they'll be talking to themselves...LOL...so save your breath. I'm not interested in heated discussions, and that seems to be the only kind that happen with posts like these.
I read this post and the one before and I have to say that I completely understand where CPS is coming from on these situations. no I do not think good parents should go to jail, and I don't think that kids should get the cops called on them because they are playing ball in their front yard. HOWEVER - in the world we live in, you can NOT let your 6 and 9 yr old play alone at the park. you just cannot. it's unfortunate, but as I read that I thought "what a dumb parent for leaving his kids!" and I do not think a girl, no matter her age, should go to the gas station to make a purchase by herself. not ever. maybe I am a rookie mom, afterall, I only have 2 children and they are young. but children should be watched at all times - at the park, at the store, etc. CPS being involved or not, I don't care. bad things happen when parents look away. and that's just how the world is. if you want your kids to grow up in the same way you were raised 35 years ago...you should have had them 35 years ago. because it's just not the same and we cannot act like it is.
This is such a difficult subject. I commend you for bringing it to the forefront. I'm just approaching my eldest coming up to an age that she could do things like go to the park without me, but fear of judgement, CPS, ect really does worry me. I was let to play freely, and while I want that for my children I find it hard to know exactly how to give it to them.
I have had our neighbors call the police on me when my daughters were playing in our garden (completely fenced in). I was to the side of the house, hanging clothes on the line. I could see the children from where I was. The girls were 2 and 4. Simply because they could not see me from their window, the neighbors had the police visit me! Now nothing came of it, we had our visit from CPS and the police who found no concerns, but it has made me very paranoid about how I am being watched as a parent.
How do I now let my children build independence? I feel a little lost, if I am honest.
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