One Way to Make Marriages Work

So there is this "5 reasons why marriage can't work" (like ever) article going around social media. It's been alarming that so many people are in agreement with the ideas that marriage can never work. But I think in part, that I know the main answer to the problem and the issue. The generation younger than mine and many in our generation weren't/aren't taught to prepare for marriage. 

Many people in America today spend their teen and young adult years degrading the opposite sex, having sexual relationships with multiple partners, and watching pornography and other pornographic media. I think it's pretty obvious that one cannot indulge in those things without forming bad habits and addictions. A wedding ring doesn't magically remove previously developed sexual desires, anger and bad habits. If we want the next generation to have good marriages we must teach them how to become the husbands and wives they ought to be long before the engagement.

The Most Important Thing for Young Children to Learn

I let Anya stay home from school today because she slept in her clothes and when I told her to put on clean clothes, she completely lost it. I sent her back to bed and told her I would not send her to school behaving that way. Then as I continued making lunches I had some thoughts about her and how to care for young children in general. I knew that I needed to allow her to stay home from school and to have her help me with the little kids and with the day's chores.

I thought that we, as a society, expect the wrong things from our little children. Instead of expecting them to behave themselves and to be kind and help at home, we expect them to go to school as if it was a full time job and then to come home and do homework and then to go to sports and music lessons and then to practice and then to go to bed, wake up and do it all over again. It's not that they shouldn't work hard and develop their talents, but they have their whole lives for that. Right now the most important thing for them to learn is how to behave. To do that they need less outside pressure and more time to interact, particularly with their family. 

So Anya took what I like to call a "mental health day" off from school. She spent relaxing time playing games with Joseph in the morning and then time tending the younger children while I deep cleaned the house.

Rachel Turns 9

Little Rachel, the girl in the middle, turned 9 today. She is so tiny. Most people think she is 6 or maybe a small 7 year old. She's our little songbird and such a delight to have in the family. Rachel is one of our friendliest and light-hearted kids. She loves to cuddle, draw, run, and of course act and sing. Rachel adores fairy tales, Santa Claus, princesses, and everything magic and girly. Rachel loves the color pink and wearing make-up, nail polish, and high heels. She has a lot of friends at school and church. She gets along well with other people without much compromise. We love our little Rachel!

This Week at Our House # 14

1. Whenever I think about John and his week, I think about his job. I think I have become somewhat obcessed about making sure everything is going well and on time. But I know that John thinks of himself as so much more than just a job. He spends a lot of time writing, drawing, playing games with Johnny, building legos with the younger boys, holding the babies, and more...
2. I love spring break!!! I have been loving going over the last week of Christ's life as a week long Easter celebration with my family too. Life is good. 
3. Ruth got her Act score and she is happy and is not going to retake it. Ruth's enjoyed her spring break and time off. She went roller skating with her friends and had a lot of fun. And she has slept in past 10 and stayed up past midnight every day of spring break.
4. Kate has read a couple of books and has even passed one along to me, which I read very quickly, myself. We love Agatha Christie.
5. Johnny has been sleeping a lot during spring break. He had a lot of fun jumping some bouncy houses that I took the younger kids to on Tuesday. In fact, I would say that Johnny, Adam, and Rachel had the most fun. And I was thinking the littlest ones would like it the most.
6. Adam has enjoyed his time off. I have been pretty free about computer time and he has spent a lot of time on the wii honing his gaming skills. But since he doesn't sleep in much, we have been a little stricter about him getting to bed before midnight.
7. Rachel is my first child to count the hours (rather than days) down to her birthday, which happens to be today.
8. Anya and Joseph are very close. They hang out together and play together all day long. I love that my kids are friends.
9. Joseph has done a much better job of staying out of things that do not belong to him. I had a long talk with him on Sunday about the consequences of lying, and stealing, as well as the consequences on breaking and destroying things. I think he has begun to internalize it some. I am still asking him to tell me the consequences when I sit down with him. And every day I have been giving him a scenario and asking him what he thinks would be the best action.
10. Joshua is an emotional little 4 year old. He is also very cuddly and seems to really need lots of physical attention.
11. Arwen, my little sweetie, can do so much for herself, like brush her teeth, change her clothes, and wash her hands, but she does not want to potty train. 
12. Suzy went through a little growth spurt. She ate and ate for a whole week and gained a pound and I am sure at least another inch. She was smaller than her cousin two weeks ago and now she is considerably bigger.

This Week's Pictures

This Week at our House # 13

1. John's been getting his work done earlier in the day so that he has more time with the kids later in the afternoon. Arwen and Josh like to sit next to him and cuddle each morning as he works. We'll finally be getting the first paycheck. It has been mailed, and we expect it soon.
2. This week has been incredibly busy. I have been giving a calling at church after more than a year off from doing anything in our ward. I am with the 8 year old cub scouts. That's a bit terrifying to me. I know nothing about the scout program.
3. Ruth had her 17th birthday on Sunday. We just had a normal family celebration and she will have her best friend over for a movie tonight. She had a busy week filled with some important tests. Third term ends today, and there's just one quarter left to the school year.
4. Kate had some big exams and papers this week too. Spring break starts at the end of the school day today. We're all glad for the break from the work and the schedule.
5. Johnny had a very busy week with plenty of work on his projects and tests. He had an orchestra concert which was really nice too.
6. Adam and Rachel finished the musical over the weekend. It was a lot of work over many months,but the play turned out really well. The singing, dancing, sets and everything looked and sounded great. Adam plans to do it again.
7. We took Rachel and Adam out to dinner after the final show Saturday night. Rachel said she was hoping more people from the play would go to the same place, and they did. Rachel looked awesome on the stage. She loves to sing, and her acting was really good too.
8. Anya's class is doing a little opera. Anya is a star fish and had fun making a star fish costume with Kate.
9. Joseph can be cheery and intelligent and just an all around great kid and then he sneaks and gets into and steals other's things in our home. I do not know what to do about it. He's so impulsive.
10. On Wednesday, I have a little extra time to just focus on Josh and Arwen. We color, build puzzles, I help them to write their names. I like having this time with the little ones. Josh is going to primary without any trouble now too.
11. I've been potty training Arwen. I don't think it's going to be easy.
12. Suzy's just a little doll. I love her beautiful smiles. She loves to laugh and find things to laugh about. If she hear's laughing she gets all excited and starts to laugh too.

This Week's Pictures

Ruth Turn's 17

She's 17!. I can't believe I have been a parent for 17 years and that in just one more year she will be graduating high school, moving out and going to college. It's a good thing I have a lot more kids to keep me company through all this growing up stuff. I love being a parent. Sometimes the days go by slowly and I wonder how we will make it through some things. But the years go fast and I'm left with just the memories of each child as a little one.

Happy Birthday, Ruth and thank you for making me a mom.

Anya Spells

In our school, they learn to read and spell through phonics. I love the program because my kids have picked up reading so fast and so easily. But sometimes the spelling turns out a little funny.

Anya spelled totally: toadallea