Thoughtful Thursday: What Really Fulfills a Woman

I think it is interesting that when Adam and Eve left the Garden of Eden, they were given separate curses. Adam was cursed to have to work for food. Eve was cursed with pregnancy and child birth.

Genesis 3:16-19

"16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
 17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life;
 18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;
 19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art,and unto dust shalt thou return."

The  Proclamation on the Family further tells us those are not just curses, but the primary and divine roles of the individual genders.

"By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. "


Today the world is not only teaching women that they must endure pregnancy and child birth, but that they must give up their nurturing nature, leave their children and work like a man for the support of the family. Most Women today are indoctrinated to believe that unless women work outside the home and earn money, they are worthless, and stupid, and have wasted their talents.

After 65 years of mocking and feminism and girls in school being taught that motherhood is a worthless pursuit, most women not only physically leave the home to find some "fulfilling" career, but their hearts have turned from their children. At best the ordinary woman complains about what she has given up to be a mother, feeling like she could have had a better life. At worst, a woman despises the fruit of her womb and aborts her child. As a recent and alarming trend, many mothers are just throwing away their new born infants.

Today, the heart of men and women have grown cold. As a group, children are despised and their needs are neglected for the pretended needs of adults. With mothers out of the home working to fulfill whatever she thinks will make her great and popular in the eyes of the world, Satan has, in one to two generations all but destroyed the family. Without the mothers there to nurture them, many children do not have the attachment and love they need. As a result, the world has ended up with an entire generation of people who feel "entitled". They seek for love by having unmarried sex and multiple sexual partners. They fall easily into addiction of pornography. They feel entitled to a job that will fulfill them and improve their self-esteem. Work is no longer about sustaining life. Work is about getting other people to notice they are special. Why? Because their mothers never gave them the one thing they needed most: their presence.

God knows what the most fulfilling thing a woman can be is-- a mother that gives her heart and sole to her children.

Management Monday: The Proclamation on the Family Celebration

The most important part of managing a family of any size is finding the time study and teach religion. Children need a guiding star if they are not going to fall for just anything that is exciting and popular.


For the next 2 weeks, Mormon Bloggers are celebrating the Anniversary of the Proclamation on the Family. There are three bloggers that are hosting many other writers to talk about the doctrine on the family found in the Proclamation. Every year during this celebration, I find a lot of good sources and good quotes to take back to my family to discuss. Sitting together and casually discussing scripture stories and church doctrine has been the most successful way of teaching our children. I'll just read an article and start to share what I am reading with my husband and children. Then a discussion begins.

Check out all of these wonderful posts at:

A Well Behaved Mormon Woman
Chocolate on My Cranium and
Mormon Mommy Blogs 

This Week at Our House # 34

1. This is the week I have been waiting for, for nearly six months. Exactly one month from the time our unemployment would have run out, John was offered a job!!!!! He signs the contract tomorrow. He can start anytime after that! So we made it. Well, not exactly, we made it to the light at the end of the tunnel. We will be out when the paychecks start coming again. I am trying to seriously curb everyone's "to buy when dad get's a job list". But, oh, we all feel lighter and happier, and safer, and just better.
2. I had my usual busy week with the kids in school and homework and all. By Friday, I was so tired that when John announced a job offer, I had a hard time switching my emotions from "survival" to "celebration". We went on the first date out in many months. That felt good. I can't wait to get back to normal worries and stresses. Thank you everyone for your prayers and faith.
3. Ruth loves high school and her haircut. With shorter hair, Ruth's hair is naturally wavy in a really good way. She is loving it. She doesn't even have to brush her hair now. It just falls in place.
4. Kate is struggling to manage school and homework and friends. I wish I had a good answer for her. I may have her drop down in math. She does not want to and she has a solid A, but her class is very, very time consuming. I don't think pre-cal at 14 will mean as much in her life as more friend and family time. She just really, really likes doing well academically.
5. Johnny finished his Faith in God for church. We were so slow about getting that done, there were times when I wondered if it would happen. Johnny is still doing amazing in school. That is not surprising. What is surprising is that Johnny is doing amazing socially.John and I would have never guessed that among our 3 oldest kids Johnny would have the easiest time making friends and making himself a part of the group.
6. Adam didn't realize that John got a job. He came to me about 5 hours after we announced the good news and said, "Wait a minute. Does Dad have a job?"
7. Rachel finished reading her first ever chapter book without help. I sure love checking off those milestones.I got to do Meet the Masters in Rachel's classroom this week. I always love seeing my kids in their school environment.I was going to volunteer weekly until John got a job. Well, John got a job. That is a good reason not to start volunteering.
8. Anya is starting to read a little bit. She's been pretty easy to teach, and I like that little bit of reading time that I get with her each day.
9. We have a loft room just over our front entry way and stairs. In the room there is only a wood railing before a long drop to tile. This week, Joseph has attempted to climb over that railing. That kid just keeps on giving me heart attacks. I will pray that he survives. If I knew a way to get him to obey me better I would feel safer.
10. Joshua wore his church clothes this week, but not the vest. He doesn't like the vest. 
11. Arwen is stepping around a lot more, but not walking yet. I think it will happen soon. She is also trying out temper tantrums, so I have been trying out time out.

Thoughtful Thursday: Never About Me

The number one most important thing I have learned from my children is that life is never about me.  My children have taught me that life is about us. My marriage is never about me. My marriage is about us. In fact my marriage isn't just about my husband and I. My marriage is about my husband, myself and all of our children. All about me is lonely.

Sometimes I get angry. When I am angry I think that everyone in my family should do what I want. I want what everyone does to be about me. What I think is best becomes the most important.

When I am angry, I am wrong. When I am angry, I am not happy. I am happy when I take everyone's needs, thoughts, and opinions into account. When we take care of everyone, that is when our family is the happiest. Family life, marriage, and parenting are never about me.

Management Monday: Homework Mayhem

We are well into the 2013-2014 school year. Homework is coming full speed and many of the kids have already had some major exams. With 6 kids now in school,  homework makes home schooling seem like a dream come true. Once car pooling ends, I become the teacher until dinnertime.

Much to my annoyance, we are getting plenty of homework beginning in kindergarten. This includes reading time, flash cards, and math drills. My oldest two often need assistance or questions answered in math. Sometimes we have to run to the store to get supplies for science experiment homework!! Really????

I need to find a way to manage this mayhem successfully. Currently, I make everyone grab their own snack. Sometimes I have homemade cookies or bread hot and ready and sometimes they just need to get some fruit or vegetables to tide them over until dinner.

Once we are all settled in the house, I have the 3 elementary school kids bring me their backpacks and I get everything signed off. (I think teachers are a little looney making parents sign for everything.)

Then I go by age. I start with Anya who is in kindergarten and needs me to do flashcards and have her read to me. While Anya is doing this Adam and Rachel are supposed to be doing their math homework. After Anya is finished, I start with Rachel.

Rachel needs to read. I must help her practice spelling words, do a timed reading speed sheet and make sure she understood her math.

Adam then has to complete timed math drills. Finally I am available for the older kids questions.

We have been having problems with Kate in the 9th grade. All of her teachers are giving her huge amounts of homework each night. She has been up until 11pm finishing her homework. Then she has to be up by 6:50 and off to school at 7:30. Today, I am starting something new. Kate is a perfectionist and works very slowly and carefully. When she gets home today, I will set the timer for 2 hours and Kate will have to work quickly and less carefully. She needs time to exercise, play, and spend time with her family. I do not think it is healthy to have school be 100% of her life. I suspect Kate will have trouble and cry for the first couple of days and then figure out how to get all of her work done in two hours.

Honestly, I resent so much homework for all of my children. It is excessive!!

Often I wonder what they're doing all day in school to come home with so much work. I hope we will be able to manage this school year and all of the ones that follow.

This Week at Our House # 33

1. We had a much better week this week. Nothing's changed with jobs, but nothing else broke. We got used to the hotter house. It's nice to know that our bodies can adjust. By the end of the week, it rained and the air got cooler.
2. We still do not have our van fixed. I fully expect to have it on the road before the close of the next week. After we know how much the van is going to cost, we will consider getting the furnace fixed. I had a nice girl's night out with a couple of friends Thursday night. 
3. Ruth had a good second week of high school. She's making some good new friends and seems quite happy.
4. Kate has tons of homework every night, and she is getting good grades. She is also starting to make friends. Kate's loves art and has 2 art classes.
5. Johnny continues to do quite well in school. He does not have tons of homework and he is getting good grade without much studying.  
6. Adam had a lot of homework this week. I am still hoping, this was a fluke and Adam won't generally have too much work. 
7. Rachel finished off her last week of vacation. She goes back to school tomorrow and is really glad. I am hoping that the next time she is off track, I can make her vacation fun.
8. Anya is doing great in kindergarten and beginning to read. She excitedly went to her first birthday party on Saturday. She's such a cutie.
9. Joseph seems to have settled into the school schedule and his own little home schedule well. I look forward to seeing him home this week as the oldest kid at home.
10. We were given a hand me down little suit for Joshua for church. Since his old church pants recently got a hole in the knee, I was quite pleased. Today while dressing Josh, John pretended that these clothes were going to eat him. After that Josh screamed and screamed. John struggled to dress him, but Josh just tore off the clothes and cried until I put him in his old clothes. Hopefully, dressing will go better next week.
11. Arwen has had quite the eye infection. I can usually get them to go away by keeping the eyes clean, but this one is stubborn. I think I will have to take her to the doctors this week. I wish the eye drops were over the counter. I hate having to go to the doctor for such a small and easy problem to fix.

This Week's Pictures

I got tired of my hair, so I cut it off myself.

This Week at Our House #32

1. Life's been rough. The fan on the furnace quit and we have not been able to run our a/c. The temperature got around 100 a few days this week. The hot house along with the broken van, a broken wii, no job, and a few other things have made it extra tough for John. He's been mopey. The kids have asked what is wrong with dad. I think he's just over burdened and really sweaty. On a bright note, he had another job interview this week, and he has two more this coming week. 
2. I am in the same boat with John feeling the weight of our situation very heavy. Even if John had a job a broken van, furnace, and wii would still be stressful. I keep thinking about D&C 121. It says, "If thou will endure it well..." Endure it well is not the same thing as to endure. Everyone who does not take their own life endures. I hope I am enduring it well. I try and I know John tries very hard to endure cheerfully. I hope we are doing okay. I started to get used to the school schedule this week. I still miss the lazy care-free, schedule free days of summer.
3. Ruth started at Bountiful High. She's loving it. She likes pretty much all of her classes. She has more friends. She is cheerful and looking forward to a good year.
4. Kate's having a tough time transitioning from home school to public school. She's had hours of homework each night and misses her family time. I think she is trying to make friends and enjoy her classes and teachers. But she will have to try and look for the positive.
5. Johnny has transitioned very well. He's doing great.He's getting good scores on his quizzes. He likes his classes and he is making friends fairly easily. He does not have much homework, but when he does, he does it right away. I haven't had to nag him at all.
6. Adam has been a bit tired and grumpy during the transition from lazy summer to school schedule. He has had very little homework. He likes his 3rd grade teacher, but misses his 2nd grade teacher.
7. Rachel had a rough week. She does not like being the only school kid on vacation. She's had to do a whole lot of chores all week because she's been fighting with everyone. 
8. Anya loves kindergarten. On Friday, she excitedly told me that she has 5 friends now.
9. Joseph wrote his name for the first time. I've been having him practice his letters and he finally got it. The small e has been hard for him to write. I made him practice 100 of them. After that, he wrote his name.
10. Josh has had a bad cold and now has a double eye infection. Poor little guy. His cousin gave him some train and car underwear. He loves them. I think we might try them out. I think I am going to begin potty training Josh.
11. Arwen eats now. She doesn't seem to be afraid of food anymore and eats a variety of things. She really enjoyed salmon tonight.

This Week's Pictures

My sweaty kids from no a/c

My sweaty husband

Ruth got her hair cut. This is the shortest it's been since she was 3. I think it looks great!