We moved our stuff into storage and I signed my kids up for school at my parents' house and I am so sad that we don't have our own house. My parents are being really kind. There are way too many people in their house as one sister, plus one sister and her two kids already lived here for years, and my other sister moved in a week after us. So there are 19 people in a home that is just a little bit smaller than the one we moved from.
We have enough money to easily pay rent and living expenses for 6 months, but no one will rent to us because John does not have a job. I feel heart broken, and depressed and abandoned. I feel like this trial has been never ending. I know we are not the only people who experience things in life like this. I know it is a part of how life is supposed to be, I just wonder how much lower we can actually go.
My parents have been very kind to us. They say they want us here and that we can stay. But it doesn't mean it's not hard on them and on us and on my sisters and on the other 2 kids.
On a happier note, Adam got a fishing pole for his birthing, and John took Adam and Johnny fishing for the first time. They didn't catch anything, but they really enjoyed it.
One more happier note: The ward is exceedingly nice. The youth program is huge and our kids have been very welcomed.
And as a point of interest, the older girls and I always talked about how if we moved, we wanted to move to a place that rains more. Well, we have been here for 17 days and it has rained 13 of them. And it was all day rain storms not just rain for an hour. Everything smells musty. Today, the sun is shining, for the 4th day, and we are going to the park.
4 comments:
We're praying for you. I'm so glad that Adam had a good birthday and that the youth program is good. Keep your chin up. I know that it's been a hard road.
7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.
8 The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?
Oh my gosh, you are having a trial by fire.It will end and in the end you will see the blessings in disguise. We seriously had some similar experiences. We have had children live with us and the worse was when they left we felt so sad. Your parents must be truly awesome and you will forever be blessed by their loving concern.
Praying that your dear husband gets a job soon. Blessings and hugs!
Remember the story Christ tells about the two men who were each in debt... one a little and one a lot? And their master forgave both the debts and Christ asks the person He's telling the parable to, "Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most?" (Luke 7:42) I think Heavenly Father knows that you are a very good person whom He doesn't need to worry about with regards to committing sins that will require a tremendous amount of forgiveness on His part. But He also wants you to know more deeply of the sweetness and tenderness and all-encompassing power of the Atonement. Soooo... crappy trial it is. I am sorry for your struggle and suffering. But you are like the Nephite women who, in 1 Nephi 17, are blessed by the Lord to be strong enough to handle their afflictions. Those women (and Pioneer women) are my heroes. I believe in you!
(I wish I ran a computer programming company so I could hire your husband.)
You are in my thoughts. Wish you all the best.
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