My Opinion on Moral Erosion

As I have been looking at and researching different moral issues that are abounding in our nation and world today, I have come to a rather sad and scary conclusion.

In 2003 we lived in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Gay marriage became legal in Ontario then. At the time, I honestly didn't care at all. They could live their lives. I could live mine. I really did not care if two gay people wanted to get married or not. I didn't like the intimacy in the streets after gay marriage was legalized because my small children were asking about it. But I did not think it would affect me or my family in any adverse way. John felt otherwise, and he was correct.

At that time, one of the main arguments against gay marriage was that it would pave the way for the legalization of plural marriage. I felt the same about plural marriage as I did about gay marriage-- you do what you want, and I will do what I want. I did not understand what changing a law could mean.

Nine years later, I have learned a lot. I have seen how changing the laws about morality changes what people are allowed to do and say, and it changes what people think, what they are willing to accept, and how they behave. What people are willing to accept has not turned to polygamy. Most people are still appalled by polygamy, and judges have upheld polygamy laws, even in very liberal countries like Canada.

 Nine years ago, I would have never thought that a photographer, a doctor, a bed and breakfast owner, a banquet hall owner could be sued for discrimination simply by turning down someone interested in their services.

Nine years ago, I would have never guessed that a pastor of a church could be sent to jail for handing out religiously based teachings on homosexuality.

Nine years ago, I would have never guessed that the same adults who think that 10 and 12 year old kids are not capable of marrying, holding down a job, playing at a park without supervision, eating in a restaurant alone, driving, using a credit card, walking a mile to school are the same adults that believe 10 and 12 year old kids need to have full access information about sexual intercourse, private body parts, homosexuality, gender identity and variations, masturbation, etc. A 12 year old is encouraged to have sexual relationships, question his or her sexual orientation, have full access to abortions, but a 12 year old is not expected to be capable of holding down a job or even crossing a busy street alone.

This is where changes in laws have taken us. And it is scary!

One last thought:
 I cannot blame this all on gay marriage. The sexual revolution and the rejection of  the Judeo- Christian moral code is where this all began. Gay marriage is another step toward the social rejection of God's laws. Before gay marriage came co-habitation and no fault divorce. Both of these have been very bad for children, families, and society in general. Marriage has been eroding for decades, and it is sad where it has taken our society.

Pop the Balloon

Joseph came up to me while I was sitting on the couch, punched me in the stomach and said, "Pop the balloon!"

Don't worry, two year old kids don't punch very hard, and yes, I just cleaned the kitchen and really ought to have worn an apron.

Recent Pictures

Kate made a cake and blew up a balloon inside it to demonstrate volcanoes to the little kids.

My cute kids playing nicely together.

This is how Kate came home from Shakespeare Showdown: fake scar, but real cat shaped sunburn.

Joshua at the homeschool field day

Rachel and Anya standing in line on field day.

Joseph kept cutting in line.

Ruth with a bunch of her homeschool friends on field day. She was glad that I made her go.

This is how Anya put away all of the shoes.

Joshua has learned to smile when he sees a camera.

Isn't he adorable!

Expert on Potty Training: NOT

I am going to answer a question form Tracey Brumlik:

Since your an expert and I'm just starting potty training #1...what should I do or not do?

To be honest, I cannot say there is one good way, nor is there a one size fits all solution to potty training. My experience with potty training has been different with every child!

If I was going to give advice about party training this is what I would say:

1. Potty training is gross!!!!!! It makes changing five poopy diapers a day seem pleasant.
2. Everyone will be ready and willing to tell you the best way to potty train your child. I am guilty of this. (Just ask my sister.)
3. The truth: you know yourself and your child the best.  Trust yourself the most on the matter.

Here are some things to consider before potty training:

1. Do messes make you mad and stressed?
2. What are some things you have had success using to encourage your child to either change a behavior or to do something new? (Examples: candy, time outs, promised gifts, sticker charts, a soft voice).
3. How well does you child communicate his or her needs with you?
4. Does your child care if he or she is messy or not?

This is what I generally do:

1. I have my child try out the toilet to see what he or she will do. If the child knows what to do then great. If not, then I spend a day at home giving the child drinks and sitting by a potty chair until the child figures out what to do. Sometimes this just does not work. It depends on the child.
2. When the child knows what to do, I take off the diaper and put on underwear. This works well if the child cares if he or she is messy, and if I can calmly handle cleaning up poopy pants and pee on everything. (Sometimes I am not ready for the mess when I think I am). If the child doesn't care or if I am finding that every potty mess is making me angry, it does not work.
3. Next, I remind the child to use the bathroom every couple of hours.
4. When the child is staying dry for a few days on reminders, I quit reminding and make the child tell me when he/she has to go.
5. When the child is doing it all on his or her own, I flood him/her with praise over a few days and there after send him/her to timeout for accidents (being cautious about possible UTI"s)

When I can't get the child to go in the toilet, or when I find myself flipping out and yelling over the mess, I put the diaper back on and wait anywhere from 3 to 6 months, only letting the child try the toilet before baths. I remind myself, that it will happen at some point.

Here are a few of my experiences:

1. My first child was young (before age two). It took quite a while to get her to understand what I wanted her to do. Once she understood, she was dry day and night after only a week. But she was so little that I had to help her in the bathroom for the next year and a half.
2. Two of my kids knew exactly what to do, but were pretty stubborn and had daily accidents for about 4 months. I still kept them in underwear and continued potty training.
3. One child was afraid to poop outside of a diaper. He would go five days and then poop his pants in a panic. After about 2 weeks, I took him to the store and said he could buy whatever he wanted, and let him know that he would not get it until he put his poop in the toilet. He chose a Hershey bar. He pooped in the toilet the next day and never had a problem after that.
4. One child hid in her closet to poop and then tried to hide her poop or wipe it up with toys or towels. I could not handle the messes at all. Her diaper went  back on. After 6 months I tried again, leaving her alone to do her stuff. She did it fine and only ever had one more accident.

I hope this helps. But, I have to say, potty training is very, very gross, and very hard. I know people who do pull-ups for a year. Really, I think whatever works best for you and your child.

An Hour in a Day

Yesterday, We drove from our house to Grandma's house for some cousin fun and grilled steak! That takes an hour! But it is worth the hour.

Pride and Accomplishments

I feel proud and very accomplished for having potty trained seven children. Maybe I shouldn't, but in my opinion the two hardest things to do with young children are potty training and teaching them how to read. So far, I only have 4 good readers, but 7 potty trained... that seems like an accomplishment to me.

Thankful for a Good Coach

Johnny likes soccer a lot, but he has my long legs and coordination issues. So he will never be the best on his team. This last season, however, Johnny has blossomed. Last fall, he was shy about going after the ball. This spring Johnny has become an asset to his team and it is all because of a really good coach. I might add, that his coach is 100% volunteer-- just some girl's father.

He has put Johnny is in positions where he has to go after the ball or  his team might loose. Giving Johnny that trust boosts his confidence. And guess what? Johnny is doing really well. His improvement is astonishing!

This coach has taught Johnny things that John and I don't think to teach to our children. One time, Johnny was telling his coach something and his coach stopped him and kindly said, "Look me in the eyes when you are talking to me." (Johnny tends to look at his feet.) What a great thing to teach my kid! He has reminded me to look in my kids' eyes when I speak to them.

I am very thankful for this amazing soccer coach that has has helped my son shine in ways he would never have!

Oh, and by the way, Johnny's team is the star team! I shouldn't be surprised with such a great coach.