Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Stop Sending Me This

I accidently signed up for this email from a website called newsmax. I hate the emails they send. They are dramatic and annoying. I have tried twice to get off their email list but to no avail. But here us a sample of the ridiculous things I get in my inbox almost daily.

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  • Will Your job (or any job) be safe in the Coming Years?
  • Will the Stock Market Plunge 50% (or More) — Taking Your Retirement With It?
  • Will Our Entire Economy Collapse When Communist China Stops Writing Us Blank Checks?
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General Conference Talk Summary: Robert D. Hales

Robert D. Hales: Our Duty to God: The Mission of Parents and Leaders to the Rising Generation

  • "For all of us, doing our duty to God as parents and leaders begins with leading by example—consistently and diligently living gospel principles at home. This takes daily determination and diligence."
  • "It is impossible to overestimate the influence of parents who understand the hearts of their children."
  • "For our interactions with youth to truly touch their hearts, we have to pay attention to them just as we would pay attention to a trusted adult colleague or close friend. Most important is asking them questions, letting them talk, and then being willing to listen."
  • "Mother, Father, are you in there? Grandpa, Grandma, are you there? Being there means understanding the hearts of our youth and connecting with them. And connecting with them means not just conversing with them but doing things with them too."
  • "The greatest missionary work we will ever do will be in our homes. Our homes, quorums, and classes are part of the mission field. Our children and grandchildren are our most important investigators."
  • "The greatest faith we have will be within our homes as we remain strong in the trials and tribulations of parenthood. To a small group of mothers, President Monson recently said, “Sometimes we are too quick to judge the effect of our successes and failures.” May I add, don’t look at today’s trials as eternal. Heavenly Father does His work in the long term. “There is much which lieth in futurity,” the Prophet Joseph Smith said. “Therefore, . . . let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed” (D&C 123:15, 17)."

My favorite part of this talk is the "are you there?"  For years, I thought that when my youngest child entered first grade, I would go back to college and get that coveted bachelor's degree that I chose to put off after I got pregnant with Ruth. Then about 2 years ago I realized that if I did that, then I would not be there for my children, and I wouldn't be there for them at a time when I would be needed even more than when they were babies. I knew that I could not keep a nice home, make dinners, help my kids with their school work, know what they are doing, and just be there to talk and to be a friend, plus attend classes, complete homework assignments, and study for and take exams. I gave up that dream 100% that day. How tragic would it be if I was busy getting good grades and being smart while not making sure my children were busy getting good grades, and more importantly, gaining strong testimonies. I want to be there. I want to know their friends. I want to know what they are thinking and feeling, and to do this, I will give up what I have to. Some days that means sleep. It means nice clothing, and sometimes it means dreams. But, I think I am a way better learner now than when I was working for that degree. Heavenly Father does have a way of taking care of parents and children.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Change = Challenge

So, there have been a few things in my life that I think I am just great at and then something in my life changes and I realize that no, I actually stink. This has happened recently. But first, I will have to tell of a time long ago. Back in the college days and early marriage, I thought I did not have a temper. I never got angry. I never yelled. If some one disagreed with me, I didn't argue back (I just thought they were stupid ;)). Then, Ruth turned 2, and BAM!! Ruth followed another family out of the library onto a busy road and the next thing I knew we were in the car heading home and I was yelling. I was down right angry with my little 2 year old. So, I found out that I did indeed have a temper. I am still working on this one. Hopefully, but not likely, I will get this one fixed in 10 more  months before I have a teenager. Now, fast forward 9+ years. At this point in time, I think I do a really good job at being nice to people who are not nice to me. I think that I am a really good neighbor and friend. I don't gossip. I cut down the bothersome tree. I make brownies for the neighbor that gets mad when my kid crashes her bike into their car. I never say anything grumpy to the condescending doctor. I don't get upset when my friends kid dumps out all of our toys and pees in them. I think I am pretty good. I think being of one heart and one mind isn't so hard. Then we move out near family, and spend a lot of time in other people's business and other people spend a lot of time in our business and suddenly, I gossip a little here and there, about people I care way more about than the grumpy neighbor. Someone says something to me that hurts my feelings and I am upset for several days. I want to say mean things back or not talk to them anymore or all of these ridiculous feelings I had never had before. Suddenly, I realize that I have a problem that I thought I didn't. So, now, like my temper, I have reached a new challenge in life. I need to learn to that if I hear intimate details about people I absolutely cannot gossip or judge that person. I think just walking away from conversations like that is a pretty good idea too. I need to learn to not be angry when I find out that other people have been gossiping about me. I need to shut up and not respond when people are saying things to me that hurt my feelings. I am determined to do better. And of course, I need to not judge people when they gossip or say something mean to someone else. I really do believe in Zion. I really do think we can live next door to people, family, and anyone else, and get along perfectly. I want it to be like that in my home, and I want it to be like that with our extended families and neighbors too.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Sweet and Funny Kids

Here are two cute kids things that I wanted to get written down.

1.Rachel's Prayer:  Heavenly Father, help James to get a job because he is poor and he is praying.


2.Kate's Sharing Time Answer:

The teacher told a story about a girl who asked her mom to buy her a candy bar. When the mom said no, the girl stole a candy bar from the store.
Teacher: What should the girl do next time instead?
Kate: She should have asked her Mom to buy broccoli.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

General Conference Talk Summary: David A. Bednar

David A. Bednar: Watching With All Perseverance

  • "Spiritual warnings should lead to increasingly vigilant watching. You and I live in “a day of warning” (D&C 63:58). And because we have been and will be warned, we need to be, as the Apostle Paul admonished, “watching . . . with all perseverance” (Ephesians 6:18)."
  • "I pray for the guidance of the Holy Ghost as I describe a spiritual early warning system that can help parents in Zion to be watchful and discerning concerning their children. This early warning system applies to children of all ages and contains three basic components: (1) reading and talking about the Book of Mormon with your children, (2) bearing testimony of gospel truths spontaneously with your children, and (3) inviting children as gospel learners to act and not merely be acted upon. Parents who do these things faithfully will be blessed to recognize early signals of spiritual growth in or challenges with their children and be better prepared to receive inspiration to strengthen and help those children."
  • " Regular reading of and talking about the Book of Mormon invite the power to resist temptation and to produce feelings of love within our families. And discussions about the doctrines and principles in the Book of Mormon provide opportunities for parents to observe their children, to listen to them, to learn from them, and to teach them."
  • "Parents should be vigilant and spiritually attentive to spontaneously occurring opportunities to bear testimony to their children. Such occasions need not be programmed, scheduled, or scripted. In fact, the less regimented such testimony sharing is, the greater the likelihood for edification and lasting impact."
  • "The reactions of children to such impromptu testimony bearing and their eagerness or reluctance to participate are potent sources of spiritual early warning signals."
  • "As gospel learners, we should be “doers of the word, and not hearers only” (James 1:22). Our hearts are opened to the influence of the Holy Ghost as we properly exercise agency and act in accordance with correct principles—and we thereby invite His teaching and testifying power. Parents have the sacred responsibility to help children to act and to seek learning by faith. And a child is never too young to take part in this pattern of learning."
  • "Are you and I helping our children become agents who act and seek learning by study and by faith, or have we trained our children to wait to be taught and acted upon? Are we as parents primarily giving our children the equivalent of spiritual fish to eat, or are we consistently helping them to act, to learn for themselves, and to stand steadfast and immovable? Are we helping our children become anxiously engaged in asking, seeking, and knocking? (See 3 Nephi 14:7.)"
  • " The spiritual understanding you and I have been blessed to receive, and which has been confirmed as true in our hearts, simply cannot be given to our children. The tuition of diligence and of learning by study and also by faith must be paid to obtain and personally “own” such knowledge. Only in this way can what is known in the mind also be felt in the heart. Only in this way can a child move beyond relying upon the spiritual knowledge and experiences of parents and adults and claim those blessings for himself or herself. Only in this way can our children be prepared spiritually for the challenges of mortality.
    "
My Thoughts:


I feel like of all of the talks I have gone over so far, this is the one we have to work on the most. I have listened to this talk several times since it was given in April, but I have only just come to realize that Elder Bednar wishes us to read and discuss the Book of Mormon, bear our testimonies spontaneously, and invite our children to act so that as parents we can know by their reaction how they are feeling about gospel matters and spiritual things. If a child is eager to talk about the scriptures then that is a good sign. If a child seems embarrassed by a spiritual conversation or annoyed then that is a warning to the parents. John has been doing a really good job at talking to the kids about spiritual things. I need to get into a better habit of making spiritual matters a part of my daily conversation with my children. Our stake president has asked that every member of our stake read the Book of Mormon by November 20th. He has included the very young children in this as well. We have been reading three pages of the Book of Mormon each day to our children. That is up from about 10 verses. Our family scripture study is a lot harder, but it has been a lot better. John has really gotten the kids to participate and to ask questions, and to seek out the meaning of the scriptures. I think this has been good for our family in following Elder Bednar's counsel.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

We Went to the Zoo, Zoo, Zoo

We went to the zoo for a memorial day activity, and while the Salt lake City Hogle Zoo is not nearly as great as the Sedgwick County Zoo, we had a nice family time.  I loved just seeing my line of kids walk through so good and happy and together. Anya was so cute looking excitedly at all of the animals. She walked the whole time.

General Conference Talk Summary: L. Tom Perry

Elder L. Tom Perry: Mothers Teaching Children in the Home

  • "My mother understood the value of teaching her children about standards, values, and doctrine while they were young. While she was grateful to others who taught her children outside the home at either school or church, she recognized that parents are entrusted with the education of their children and, ultimately, parents must ensure that their children are being taught what their Heavenly Father would have them learn."
  • "The scope of Mother’s teaching included both secular and spiritual lessons. She made sure none of us were falling behind in our schoolwork, which she would often supplement."
  • "Teaching in the home is becoming increasingly important in today’s world, where the influence of the adversary is so widespread and he is attacking, attempting to erode and destroy the very foundation of our society, even the family. Parents must resolve that teaching in the home is a most sacred and important responsibility. While other institutions, such as church and school, can assist parents to “train up a child in the way he [or she] should go” (Proverbs 22:6), ultimately this responsibility rests with parents."
  • "Parents must bring light and truth into their homes by one family prayer, one scripture study session, one family home evening, one book read aloud, one song, and one family meal at a time. They know that the influence of righteous, conscientious, persistent, daily parenting is among the most powerful and sustaining forces for good in the world. The health of any society, the happiness of its people, their prosperity, and their peace all find common roots in the teaching of children in the home."
  • "While circumstances do vary and the ideal isn’t always possible, I believe it is by divine design that the role of motherhood emphasizes the nurturing and teaching of the next generation. We see so many challenges today from distracting and destructive influences intended to mislead God’s children. We are seeing many young people who lack the deep spiritual roots necessary to remain standing in faith as storms of unbelief and despair swirl around them. Too many of our Father in Heaven’s children are being overcome by worldly desires. The onslaught of wickedness against our children is at once more subtle and more brazen than it has ever been. Teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ in the home adds another layer of insulation to protect our children from worldly influences."




My Thoughts:
I have always thought that it is ultimately my responsibility to teach my children. I have always felt that if my child doesn't read well enough or is behind in math that I need to teach them additionally at home. I think this has done wonders. When I was a young mother with very small children, I was in a primary presidency. I was very strongly impressed as to how little we could actually do for the primary children. The children who were happy and gaining testimonies and choosing the right were the one's whose parents taught them at home. The children who were sent to primary as the only way to learn the gospel and didn't get instruction in the home were rebellious and disruptive and made jokes out of gospel principles. I was really worried about these kids. It is hard to know what to do for kids whose parents don't teach them. I agree 100% with this talk and need to continue to make education both spiritual and secular important in our home because our children are under attack.