How Rachel Knows...

Rachel excitedly came to me and and said, "My friend Brooklyn got to ride a  Pegasus, so now I know that Pegasuses are real! Isn't that, awesome, mom?" 

I  did tell Rachel that maybe Brooklyn was making that up. But Rachel would have none of it. Pegasuses are real now.

I Am Not a Commercial Vehicle From Julie Hess

I read this post from Julie Hess over at Hess's Madhouse this morning.  I thought it was so well written and thought out that I wanted to share it here. She makes a valid point that I think escapes a lot of us. I especially love her analogy of the sheep. Enjoy!

I Am Not a Commercial Vehicle

Last week, our big ol' van (affectionately known as "The Beast") was having some mechanical issues. So much so, that it had to be towed into the shop. I have a AAA membership and actually, the day before this, had received my yearly renewal forms in the mail. I called AAA to see if they would come and tow it to the shop for us.

I was told, "I'm sorry. That kind of van is considered a 'commercial vehicle,' and with your current membership, we can't tow it."  What?!  Excuse me?!  Here I've been paying for a service that they can't even provide?!  CRAZY!

I assured the gentleman on the other end of the phone that I use it daily and it transports my children. I don't use it for commercial reasons. It's a "family car."

It didn't matter what I said. They weren't going to tow it. I would have to look elsewhere, and so we did. We called other towing companies. It would cost us $400 to have it towed to the shop in the next town.

I'm finding that this experience is part of a much bigger lesson that I'm learning right now.

The other day, my daughter was present when a girl spoke up in front of her entire class and said, "All Mormons look good when they're outside, but inside they're all very different than what they show outwardly." When my daughter shared this with me, I laughed because of all the Mormons I know, that daughter's one of the most genuine I know. There is no pretense.  She is who she is inside and out. Enter the front door or enter the back door, and you get the same girl. I can't say that about all LDS people, but I'm pretty confident about her. That's her personality.

It is fascinating to me how we, as human beings, are so comfortable with lumping people into groups. Somehow everyone is either a "family sedan" or an "SUV" or a "Jeep" or a "motorcycle" or, heaven forbid, a "commercial vehicle." I'm not saying I'm not guilty of lumping because, after all, I am human, but I guess I'm just trying to illustrate that we all do it, and it needs to stop. Just because we're part of a group doesn't mean we're all the same. We are not all commercial vehicles.

In the situation with the van, I believe AAA should have looked at my situation--me, as an individual, and truly judged my need by my circumstances. I think anyone hearing this story would feel the same.

Here's another issue to ponder....Once a number of years ago, I went to Time Out for Women. This is a women's conference sponsored by Deseret Book (an LDS bookstore), so needless to say, the presenters are LDS and nearly everyone who attends is LDS.  We, to avoid parking at the Convention Center, rode public transportation (namely the light rail train system). I was with one other friend on this particular day.

It was clear that the nearest group of women to us, on the train, were going to the same place, but it was also very clear, as I overheard their conversation, that none of them were very familiar with that part of town.  I could hear them struggling to know which stop to get off at. This group of four women jointly decided to take the stop two sooner than they should have. I didn't say anything because I wanted to see what would happen(I guess sometimes I'm just evil like that), and I knew they were going to get where they wanted to go. However, it was fascinating to me that they weren't the only group of women who got off at that stop. They, being the group closest to the door, drew all of the other groups of women off the train at that very same stop. My friend and I, being a bit more experienced with that train and its stops, remained...alone.

We rode the two more stops and were let off right in front of the doors--right where we needed to be. The other women were still quite a ways away. After watching all of those women get off the train that day, I decided that we, when we associate with a group, tend to be sheep. We follow without question especially when we're unsure. We trust that others know more than we do, and we, ignorantly, follow. These kinds of circumstances, more often than not, tend to bring some difficult outcomes.

Tonight at ward council, we discussed the term "traditions of their fathers" that's found so often in the scriptures and how this habit, of following the traditions of our fathers, gets us into so much trouble in our lives. The bishop shared the fact that for years, we, as members of the Church, have had topics that we have refused to discuss. Our parents didn't discuss them with us, and so we don't talk about them either. He explained what some of those topics might be.

I believe this is very true. We want our children to live in a little bubble safe and free from all that surrounds us, but when it comes down to it, someday our children will break out of these bubbles we've so lovingly built for them. When they do, there's going to be all kinds of ugliness that they aren't prepared for.

Like I said in this post, I don't believe that LDS people are bigots. I don't believe we mean to be judgmental. I truly believe that, for the most part, we're good people, we're just uninformed and sheltered. We tend to feel that ignorance is bliss. Like I said, we want to live in a world of sunshine and roses, but we somehow think we can avoid the sunburn and thorns. We want to pretend they don't exist, and sometimes I wonder if we ignorantly believe that if we ignore them long enough, they will all go away.

In believing this way, we're getting off the train two stops too early.

I guess I need to ask the question....What are we afraid of?  Are we really going to go hide in the closet thinking Satan'll just eventually give up and go away?  Nope. We all know that's not going to happen. How long are we going to do this?

The truth of the matter is, we all need to open the door and confront him head on. Then the questions arise, how do I feel about this issue and that?  There are some HUGE issues out there, and they just seem to multiply daily. With an LDS man running for presidential office, people are going to have questions and they're going to make judgments. We're going to be lumped. Is this fair? No. I know it's not, but remember, we're all human.

If we want to avoid be lumped, we have to stop cowering in the corner. We must get some, as my husband would say, "Cajones," and figure out what we truly believe. We must, each of us, be bold when questioned about how we stand. Bold enough to not be intimidated. Of anyone in the world, we should know, and we should be strong in that knowledge. I'd also like to add that we are not alone. I had once heard that the LDS faith was the fourth largest religion in my state (Oregon), but according to this website, it looks like we might rank second to Catholicism, and I truly don't believe that we are alone. I believe there are many who aren't LDS who agree with us. Then why are we being so silent?

I'm thinking it might come down to this....How do you, as an individual--not as a sheep, feel about the issues that are facing us? How do YOU feel about abortion? How do YOU feel about homosexuality and same sex marriage? How do YOU feel about  temple ordinances? These are some of the questions I'm asking myself right now. These are topics no one has ever made me face until now. So, how do I feel? How do you feel? What do we know that will help us defend what we believe?

These are just some of the things we need to face. If you don't know, maybe it's time to open the door. The great thing is we don't have to go fearfully or blindly. We have power and prayer behind us.

One thing I learned from my adolescent literature class was that the written word is one of the best ways to formulate opinions about things. We can take our time and ponder what is written. We can talk to people we trust, those who already have formed opinions on these issues. We can add their knowledge to ours. Knowledge IS power.

I can tell you that anything facing us now has been addressed in one of the recent sessions of General Conference. The Family: A Proclamation to the World is an inspired document. It holds so many answers for us. We have so many places we can go to get answers. Most of all, we can go to our Heavenly Father and have Him direct us to what we, as individuals, need to know. Really, with all that behind us, how can we go wrong?

It is not our place to preach and be sanctimonious. It is just our place to be confident in our beliefs. When someone asks, we should have answers. We should have our OWN opinions--not some sheep-ish response. They should fit us as individuals and must be based on truths that we have come to understand for OURSELVES. They need to be individual--as unique as each of us are. Our answers are not "commercial vehicles."

In this day and age, we, as families and more especially as individuals, cannot afford to be sheep. We cannot afford to be lumped. We cannot allow ourselves to be considered commercial vehicles. The time has come for each of us to open the closet door and face what has been unspeakable, but the only way to do that is to face it in private with the Lord first. He knows us for who each of us are and will teach us what is true. He's never let us down.

If someone confronts you and you don't know how you feel, it's okay to say, "I'm not sure. I've never been asked that before. Let me think about it, and I'll get back to you on that."

Really, what do we have to be afraid of?

Potty Training

It is finally happening. After five days of wearing underwear, Joseph has only had one potty accident. He tells me when he has to go potty, and he is waking up dry every morning. He gets distressed if he is wet! HURRAY!!!!!

But, he has pooped his pants 4 of the 5 days and can't seem to  figure out how to do that in the toilet yet. Still I'll take it. Joseph tells me as soon as  he starts pooping so the mess hasn't been worse than a diaper. He does not wet his pants or his bed anymore! I will not have 3 kids in diapers when little Arwen comes in August.

Ruth's First Dance

Ruth went to her first youth dance on Saturday. I LOVED having her come home and sit in my bed with me and tell me all about the dance. Teenage girls are so fun. I cannot imagine my boys doing that. 

Ruth went to the dance late. She said there were only 35 to 45 people in attendance, even though it was a  regional dance. She said that the boys do not ask the girls to dance unless they are 16 and already dating steady. So, Ruth asked a boy to dance. As soon as he said, "yes", a severely autistic girl (cannot talk) came up and took over. Ruth shrugged and went and sat back down with her friends. But, the same boy asked her to dance for three  more dances and Ruth asked the boy's friend to dance with her friend.

Ruth came home all glowy and happy. She is a lovely girl.

Celebrating Motherhood

"Vogue model Christy Turlington Burns and a host of female celebrities are encouraging mothers across the nation to ignore their children as part of “No Mother’s Day,” a sign of their support for reducing maternal mortality by supporting family planning and global access to abortion. " (lifenews.com)

I didn't do that yesterday. A couple of years ago I had an epiphany. Growing up and all my years so far as a mother, I have heard complaints about mothers day. Some mothers feel guilty because they don't feel like they measure up. Some mothers don't like that they still have to change those diapers and feed those kids, and some mom's are sad that their husbands and kids haven't clued in and given them breakfast in bed and gifts.Two years ago, I realized an important truth. Motherhood is glorious, divine, and definitely something to celebrate!

Two years ago, I  realized that I could celebrate Mother's Day best by trying to be the best mother I could. I did that by happily changing some diapers, holding the crying baby in church, reading repetitive stories to my kids, playing and crafting with my kids, and making them food that they like. Because well... my kids are who made me a mother. They are who made me noble.

Suddenly, I had no guilt about not being the best mother. I didn't care if doing all of the cooking and cleaning and diaper changing was too much for my husband to do alone. And well, my dearest husband has always gotten me lots of fun gifts. (Never felt bad there.) I realized that motherhood in all of its mess, and time, and sloppy kisses, and tears is something to celebrate!


So yesterday while Hollywood moms ignored their kids and didn't call their mothers in order to support contraceptives and abortion, I happily dressed my kids early for church, curled my daughter's hair, made breakfast, lunch , and dinner, cleaned dishes and diapers, held the crying baby in church. I laughed with my kids, read scriptures and talked about life with my cute teenagers, helped my kids make cards for Gramma, cleaned up the craft mess, got grumpy when not enough people were helping to get us ready to leave for Gramma's house, had a wonderful conversation with my mother on the phone, and loved visiting and eating cake and brownies that I did not make with my fun in laws and family.

Life is beautiful-- motherhood is beautiful, glorious, and divine. Motherhood is definitely worth celebrating!

Playing Soccer

I asked John to get some pictures of Johnny playing soccer, and this is what he got:

 Does picking your nose count as playing soccer?

Kittens Gone

The third set of kittens from our cat Twix are all given away now. I had the add up for one day. It had 195 pageviews and we had a whole bunch of phone calls. I am glad that ksl.com classifieds makes it so easy to give away kittens. My kids really enjoy having the kittens around. I really like this method of always having kittens, but not too many cats.