This Week at Our House # 43

We took the week off from school to clean up the yard and fix the roof. The yard is done enough for the winter and the roof has a long, long ways to go. The kids worked very hard. I allowed one or two them each day to stay inside to clean and there was always someone who preferred the indoor work over the outdoor work. We have a great number of flower beds with very little flowers that had gotten very weedy. I took down all the weeds and filled the beds in with pine needles to keep the weeds from growing right back. The cat seemed to like that, and made a little nest in them. The kids did not feel like they had vacation time. On the contrary, they felt like they worked harder than ever and are looking forward to a relaxing week of school. But three acres, after a hurricane is a lot to take care of. We still have 3 trees that will probably have to come down, a giant pile of wood to burn (but at least it's all piled now), grape vines that are on the ground from their trellis being broken down in the wind and 2/3rds of a roof to repair. The chickens ate all the grapes this year. Last year we harvested them and squeezed them. They are the great big wine grapes and much too sweet to eat. We had two minor tragedies this week. Sam learned how to climb out of his crib and open doors all in the same day. Bedtime for Sam is much more difficult now.

1. John felt much better this week, and I think got a lot more work done. Everything is still the same, and we are praying harder than ever now. He has been up late into the nights working on his game. He also spends a good amount of time learning more things that have weakened his chances in job interviews in the past.
2. The place I am going to for OB care is crazy!!! They have now done two HIV and syphilis tests on me. They act like it is such a great thing that I have no stds. It makes me nervous to use the bathroom there. I remind them that these are behavioral diseases and one can know of a surety if they do not have them simply from one's own behavior. They look at me like I am crazy and insulting. Oh well, sometimes it feels good to just state what is true. 
3. Ruth has been sending us voice recordings. The last one was pretty funny. She had a lot of difficulty getting to her new area with a funny mishap in which they were given the wrong tickets to get as far as they needed to go, and ended up stuck in the train station. While stuck, they ran into an elder, new in the mission field, who had been separated from his companion and was genuinely frightened. So they stayed with him and helped him locate his companion. Maybe there was some divine intervention in all of that since they happened to be where the young lost elder needed them, even though they weren't suppose to be.
4. Kate hated all the yard work. But she did it and mowed and everything.
5. Johnny is now transcribing all the Joseph Smith papers that he downloaded. He wakes up early to claim the computer first thing and gets to work on it.
6. Adam worked hard on the roof and in mowing part of the yard. He didn't ever seem to run out of energy, though.
7. Rachel preferred to stay inside and clean the house and make some lunch. She made dinner twice this week, which is a step in the right direction, though, it did not happen without tears. 
8. Anya carried a lot of heavy logs one day and then came with me to a farm down our street where they had piled a lot of pine needles they had gathered from the storm blowing them next to the farm. I was glad to have such a huge pile stuck out for the city to collect that no one would mind me collecting.
9. Joseph carried lots of heavy wood for two days straight. He does not work steady, though. He carries a log, goes and checks the time, goes and talks to someone, and then waits for me to tell him to get back to work.
10. Joshua carried weeds away from the flower beds for me, and collected trash out of the back yard. He works steadier than Joseph, but usually cried while being told he has to do the work.
11. Arwen usually got sent to the house to clean inside because she just played outside. Inside, she  more willingly did the work. But for a 6 year old, I find Arwen very steady and reliable.
12. Susan actually did the best job of carrying weeds out for me. She was very pleasant about it and liked dragging the little plastic wagon with weeds to and from the flower beds. 
13. Sam was just delighted to have full access to the garage and tools and to be outside most of the day long. When it rained on Friday, he was sad not to be out of doors. Also, most of our stuff stayed in its rightful place (except for the tools in the garage) because Sam was occupied with other things. 
14. We are naming baby boy Gideon Moroni or Moroni Gideon. He is moving around a lot, which is always good for peace of mind, and I have been able to control my blood sugar very well with diet. I find it easier to diet when the diet is for someone other than me.

Pictures

Anya's drawing

Anya's ducks

Arwen's fish and ducks

Anya's dragon raising ducklings

Anya's people

Happy Birthday, Adam!!!

Adam has now turned 14!!!! For the first time ever, I feel like my child's age is catching up to his size rather than his size catching up to his age!!

Adam is a fun, fun teenager. He keeps us entertained with a constant string of jokes. He used to be quiet with little to say and now he has a lot to say and something on nearly every topic. Adam loves food, and thereby soccer and weightlifting. He is big and strong and very useful and capable. When I read about Nephi and Mormon being young, yet large in stature, I have an idea what that meant now. Adam is young, yet large in stature.

At 14 he is more physically capable than his three older siblings were, so he does a lot of the heavy work around the house and yard. He has been up on the roof this week replacing ripped shingles, and he is the man who carries the big heavy packages of shingles up. When I read about fixing your own roof, the first suggestion was to try and carry a package of shingles up a ladder and put them on your roof and if you were okay doing that, then you could do your own roof. It's a good thing we have Adam!!

Adam is a friend to all of us, and is often Sam's sibling of choice. When Sam is sad, he likes Adam to carry him around. The other kids love to draw with him and jump on the trampoline. He makes up wild games that they all love and John and I do not.

Adam plays the piano all the time, but he prefers to learn it his own way. He doesn't have much interest in learning the hymns or the notes particularly, but he learns difficult classical pieces and plays them all the time. Adam also LOVES classical music and keeps good, wholesome music playing in our home. The younger kids know a lot more about classical music because of Adam.

We love our Adam. He brings a lot of joy to our home.

Stories from Ruth # 59

It was my first week in Gillingham and I can say that it is nothing like any of my other areas! It is literally all suburbs and houses upon houses! Not to mention most people here are english! If anyone reading this has seen "My Fair Lady," let me just tell you that that is Gillingham and Chatham. Not the posh people in my fair lady, but the other side. They even sound like it. It is actually fairly entertaining.

I love my companion Sister Shin from Burma! She is so cute and sweet! We have so much fun laughing all of the time!

Today we visited Rochester with the Senior Sisters and the elders who we apparently share a chapel with. It was a lot of fun! We got crepes and went to the Cathedral! 

This week we saw so many miracles as many people accepted copies of the Book of Mormon. I know that the Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ and witnesses of his resurrection! I love it! And it has helped me to develop faith in Jesus Christ. I love what Thomas S Monson says about the Book of Mormon and testifies of its truth "My dear associates in the work of the Lord, I implore each of us to prayerfully study and ponder the Book of Mormon each day. As we do so, we will be in a position to hear the voice of the Spirit, to resist temptation, to overcome doubt and fear, and to receive heaven’s help in our lives. I so testify with all my heart in the name of Jesus Christ, amen." I know as we prayerfully read and ponder the Book of Mormon we can come to know more of who Christ is and learn to cleanse ourselves that we may be prepared even to see him and to be even as he is. 

This Week at Our House #42

This week was an ordinary week. The weather was nice and the kids spent a lot of time outside. Fall and Spring are the best in North Carolina. We had school, but are planning on taking this next week off to repair the roof, and clean up the yard, car, and shed. It won't be the funnest of vacations, but the work needs to be done. The kids are already claiming which outdoor chores they want.

1. We've a heard a little more from jobs, but you never know. We do need something very soon. John was sick on and off this week, so I am not sure how much he got done on his game. I know he feels pressed to finish it and was frustrated with being sick. For a few days he was worried that he had a disease rather than a virus, but then Susan got sick, and he felt glad to know it was something that could be passed on.
2. I failed the 3 hour blood glucose test and now have an official diagnoses of gestational diabetes. I have been off sugar and dessert for a long time, but now I am being very careful about carbs. One thing I find interesting is that I will often eat an apple for a snack after dinner and it is so sweet and good and I love it so much more than I did when I got an occasional piece of candy or a dessert.
3. Ruth got transferred. She is now over near water not far from the English channel. She was excited to be able see salt water again and to get out of the city. 
4. Kate worked on the art for her first kid's book and I believe she has the second one written. The art takes the longest and a lot of work on the computer.
5. Because I had 2 long doctor's appointments this week, Johnny helped a lot with school. 
6. Adam has been exercising a lot, in part because he loves to eat and in part because he likes having muscles. 
7. I spend a lot of time trying to convince Rachel to do certain important things that she really needs to do. Rachel has always had her own ways and own ideas and that is perfectly fine with me as long as the necessary things happen. And it turned out that this week we had different ideas on the matter. 
8. Anya was excited that her chicken followed her into the house, Her chicken knows her.  The same chicken also laid 7 eggs this week. The chickens have been greeting us at the door more asking for food. All summer long, they did not want much and now they seem more hungry. I think their bug supply is going away with the coming of cooler weather. Anya and Joseph love the chickens the most.
9. Joseph spent a lot of time sitting with Adam drawing pictures and then a lot of time outside playing and taking care of the animals. 
10. Joshua mostly played outside during his free time. He was also really good about school, and got all of his work done first every day this week.
11. Arwen has a little writing journal for school, and everyone of her stories are about ducks.
12.  Susan came to me and said, "Sam did this! He, he, he," then she looked frustrated because she did not have the words to describe it. And then, it was hilarious. She said, "Sam did this." She slowly dropped to the floor on her back and said, "and he cried and cried." That was a pretty cute explanation of a full on drop to the floor temper tantrum. The next night Rachel found Susan taking off her clothes and screaming desperately. She asked Susan what was wrong and Susan said that her whole body hurt. I knew the signs and we brought Susan in the bathtub where she writhed and screamed for about 15 minutes before puking. The poor girl cannot stand puking at all. Sitting in the tub was easier for us, because the last time she was sick, she would try to run away from her own puke. Fortunately, Susan seemed better almost immediately.
13. Sam is into everything!!!! He's always dumping out food because he wants it or wants to play with it. He dumped peanuts and yeast into the mortar and pestle. But when he dumps something it is always the whole package or box. We lost a large jar of peanuts to that. Another time this week, he dumped out a whole box of cereal. He also gets John's stuff so incessantly that John moved everything off of our closet floor and made it into a mini office with a lock on the door. But there is no plug in there, so Sam will still just go and unplug all of John's work computers.
14. I had another ultrasound this week-- the joys of having a high risk pregnancy-- and everything looks good. Even the extra amniotic fluid has gone down.

Pictures

From stick figures 3 months ago to this by Joseph

Kate's cover page for her first children's book

Stories from Ruth # 58

I am leaving for Gillingham tomorrow to serve with Sister Shin. It is sad to leave so many people who are going to be baptized in the next two weeks, but I am honestly so grateful for the opportunity I had to see so many miracles. Any success there was was because God blessed us and it was nothing that we did on our own. 

This Wednesday we had the wonderful opportunity of going to the temple with two recent converts Francesco and Richard. It was such a blessing to go and all of our hearts were deeply touched. After the trip Francesco just wanted to keep going back because he knew that it was a work from God and he wants to do the work to help his ancestors. It was really touching because both recent converts had lost their mothers and we were able to do that work for them. It was also Sister Thiruthtuvaraj's first time doing baptisms because they do not have a temple in India! I was so grateful for the opportunity I had to go and to feel of the spirit and importance of the temple.

I love this gospel I know that the church is true. This is God's church on the earth and because it is true it has the power to bring salvation unto man. No amount of belief alone can cause miracles, but faith which more than a belief in the only true and living God can. I love this quote by Burce R McConkie which says "But if he worships the true and living God, in spirit and in truth, then God Almighty will pour out his Spirit upon him, and he will have power to raise the dead, move mountains, entertain angels, and walk in celestial streets." I know this is true. I know God loves us and we can live with him again if we are righteous, keep his commandments, and truly come unto him.

Why I Privatized this Blog

I received this message: 

"I read your blog often to be able to see what you and your kids are up to but lately I have become more concerned as I read. I can no longer just watch and need to ask if you are in a controlling, abusive relationship. I see red flags with how you describe home life with John and how controlling he seems to be of what the children and you do. You talk about it often enough in your blog, I worry there is much more going on that you don’t talk about. Do you need help? Are you and your children safe, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally?"

It came from a person who I have only spoken to once in 2012. We were at a social gathering together when I tried to sit and talk to her because she was all alone sitting away from the group and not talking to anyone. 

I am very angry with the message, and I did not mince words. To accuse someone you don't know of abuse is a serious matter and I do not want anyone thinking such a thing is true.  John is not an abuser and it angers me to have him accused of it. This person made things up that I had not said, filling in blanks to fit her own narrative, and I am horrified. 

I usually try to be very nice about things, but I decided this was not the time to have compassion for a stranger's and feelings, but rather a time to put a stop to such untrue thoughts immediately. I don't want these horrible ideas to spread. So I gave the angriest reply I have ever given in my life.

She then came forward accusing me of writing things that I did not write. Fortunately, what I did write write still remains. 

Here are some the accusations:

John did not allow Kate to go to college: The truth is that Kate did not want to go to college. She wants to take a route less traveled and as an adult, that is her choice.

John is not letting Kate go on a mission: Nothing could be further from the truth. John was the first person to inspire Kate to go on a mission when she was still 16, and he will do even very drastic things such as selling a much loved home and property and moving to get her out in the mission field.

Everything John says in the home is what everyone has to do and we all just do it: The example given was in my last post when I said that John said no more offering computer time for chores. He thought the kids were spending too much time on the computer. I didn't disagree on that assessment, and I am not sure when limiting game time became abuse. 

And the truth: we are actually quite free about what we expect from each other and our children. John values my opinion more than I deserve. Together we counsel with our children on family matters and take their counsel and advice quite seriously. 

The truth is:

I want to put a stop to this sort of gossip now and forever. It breaks my heart. John is very good. Unemployment and health issues with a pregnancy and a van that needs repairs that we cannot make and difficulties with family and church leaders bother me little compared to having to hear accusations like this about my husband.

Yes, John has had employment trouble and it has been grueling. John has had to take a lot of slack from his family and my family, but he has not once reviled back. He just takes it, stays silent on the matter and keeps on working very hard on his own products and applying for jobs. His faith is more than solid. He is the reason my faith is solid, and my mental health is good. He is the reason our kids are happy and get along and barely even know we have troubles.

I cannot even remember the last time John and I had a fight. While this year has been the hardest year I have had in my life, it has been the best year of my marriage. Troubling times can tear people apart or they can bring people closer together. Troubling times can destroy faith or they can increase faith. We have chosen to increase our faith and grow in our love one toward another. There is no where else in this world where I receive more respect and love than in my own home. The kids very much feel the same way. 

And one more thing. John did not dictate what I should write on this matter. He told me to pray about it and decide how to handle it. He is currently asleep and does not even know what I am doing. Additionally, I do not believe in flattery or guile. I speak plainly. If there was a abuse, I would not hesitate to call it out.

This Week at Our House # 41

It was nice to have a much quieter week. Everything is still the same for the most part, but we had no further tragedies and that is nice. School went well. The kids are doing their work happily for the most part and continue to progress and learn. The weather was cooler too, and there mosquitoes are back to normal. 

1. John had part one of a job interview. I still need to grab screen shots of his current game which is coming along, though, I think he has a month to go. He is still working on making the "bad guy" ships, as well as programming the game play. We certainly need deliverance soon.
2. Well there is a first time for everything. I failed the one hour glucose test, and will be back again on Tuesday for the 3 hour test. But, it matters little to me. I was having problems in August and quit eating dessert and candy completely, which helped me to feel a little better. Now I am watching hidden sugars, which has been quite interesting. I was surprised to find out that an 8 oz cup of Greek yogurt had more sugar in it than an 8 oz cup of a homemade chocolate milkshake. But I am just staying away from both. 
3. I sure miss Ruth. I look forward to being able to talk to her. 
4. Kate is a very good artist and a very good writer, so we have been encouraging her to combine the two talents into kids books to sell kindle versions of on amazon. She got one written and illustrated onto paper this week. Then we scanned the drawings, which she will color and then design the pages.
5. Johnny was sick the first part of the week. Then at the end of the week, he snuck up early before I woke up and cleaned the two bathrooms for me. That was very nice because it gave me time to begin tackling a home repair that needed attention from hurricane damage. 
6. Adam has been happy to be outdoors more now that the weather has cooled down. He brings the kids outside to play a lot.
7. Rachel felt sick the beginning of the week. She kept Kate up in the middle of the night when she does not feel well. Fortunately, Kate never minds too much.
8. Anya has spent all of her free time outside this week. It really is nice to be outside and not sweat. Also, we got our first chicken egg and it was laid by Anya's chicken that she named Chickmunk.
9. Joseph continues to read a ton. This week he was either with a book or outside chasing the chickens.
10. Joshua cries too much. I liked how John explained it. He is the boy who just cries, so we never think there is anything wrong and we ignore it. For example, 5 minutes before dinner Josh asked if he could make a sandwich. I said no because dinner would be ready in 5 minutes. Josh immediately started bawling. Then in 5 minutes he happily ate a big healthy dinner.
11. Arwen will do anything for time to play a computer game. I have been using that, but now John says I can't anymore. That is sad for Arwen and I because now she won't get game time and now I can't get the floors picked up so pleasantly and easily.
12. Susan loves her toys. She likes to bring them to the table and set them up between boxes of cereal.
13. Sam had a little book he was looking at and singing with when I sat down to play the piano. Sam sat down beside me and began singing his little song, but to the tune I was playing on the piano.
14. I will have another ultrasound for this little guy coming up this week. I don't usually have this much prenatal care, and at this point, I am not sure it is that necessary. 

Pictures

I am not actually 59. But those were the candles we had.

Suzy wanted me to take a picture of the train track she built

Adam doing school work

chicken hat

Our first chicken egg,coming about a month after we thought